Markini Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 I wrote song a couple of weeks ago. I have tried 3 different ways to play it. Have a friend trying to write music for it too. he didn't like the reference to Crack, me either I need a better rhyme. Anyway I am donating this to Public Domain, feel free to edit or whatever. I am not posting it because it is a great song, I have written better IMO. Maybe somebody can do something with lyrics, if not nothing ventured nothing gained. " Nobody listened' Well we all gotta story that needs to be told. Stories that are young and stories that are old. Stories that are hot and stories that are cold. Did you hear the one about a woman named 'Nell" When she was younger used to by "Gale" (Like the storm) She twisted with tornados and danced with the winds. She sang with the thunder, but no one listened. She sang of the beauty in clouds, but nobody saw. She wanted to fly but had no wings So.. A wizard named Jack Tatooed an eagle on her back His magic had a knack Her face went slack and she took a little nap. She rested and slept until first light, When she awoke she had a fright! She had grown wings during the night. She felt much pleasure to her delight. She looked all around, but Jack was nowhere to be found So.. A wizard named Jack Tatooed an eagle on her back His magic had a knack But he smoked too much crack Transformed himself into a hack. Gale twisted with tornados and danced with the winds. She sang with the thunder, and everyone listened. She sang of the beauty in clouds, and everyone saw. She was a dancer of the sky and flew very far. She looked all around, but Jack was nowhere to be found So.. A wizard named Jack ODeed on crack His magic lost its knack Gale's wings vanished from her back Lucky for her, she was taking a nap. Did you hear the one about a woman named 'Nell" When she was younger used to by "Gale" (Like the storm) She twisted with tornados and danced with the winds. She sang with the thunder, but no one listened. She sang of the beauty in clouds, but nobody saw. She wanted to fly but didn't get far... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RowdyMoon Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 ok..Im no poet make no mistake about that lol...but thought this might be a challange to work something..tried the choruses.....thoughts? eehhh..now that I re read it I can see my words have gotten away from the meaning or theme of the song...oops So.. A wizard named Jack Branded an eagle on her back His magic had knack To take up the slack that her confidence lack So.. A wizard named Jack Branded an eagle on her back His magic had knack But he strayed awhile back, fell of the beaten track. So.. A wizard named Jack strung out on crack lost his magical lore, and her brand was no more fallen from grace..just a common whore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Markini Posted April 15, 2014 Author Share Posted April 15, 2014 Wow. Brevity is the soul of good writing. You trimmed up the chorus nicely, better flow. Easier for the singer not to have jam a bunch of words in there to keep in time right. (and breath). I also like how you changed the last three lines to a different rhyme and of course that last line sums up the 'fall from grace' rather succinctly. (lot of cs there lol) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tman Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 I thought it was going to be a lesson on how to sing like Paul Rodgers :unsure: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
surfpup Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 I thought it was going to be a lesson on how to sing like Paul Rodgers :unsure: I wondered if it was a track where you could jam along with FREE. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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