Murph Posted July 9, 2017 Share Posted July 9, 2017 You tell them a story for the 5th time and it's about people who they don't know, or are dead, or both. I'm just making sure they actually hear it and it's sinking in because it looks like they are too dense to absorb what I'm throwing down..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murph Posted July 9, 2017 Author Share Posted July 9, 2017 You tell them that their cellphones are spying on them and listening to every word, divulging everything about their lives. Then they'll tell you that you're paranoid, and besides, they aren't important enough to be tracked, and everything you said is paranoia ... at which time I just say calmly and without raising my voice "Hey Siri, what time is it?" and Siri answers from the phone in my pants pocket. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murph Posted July 9, 2017 Author Share Posted July 9, 2017 Better judgement kicked in. At the last minute..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gearbasher Posted July 9, 2017 Share Posted July 9, 2017 ...you buy another guitar. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneS Posted July 9, 2017 Share Posted July 9, 2017 Better judgement kicked in. At the last minute..... Too late--I can't unsee the poor little guy! 😂 Speaking of, there's always this: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duluthdan Posted July 9, 2017 Share Posted July 9, 2017 You say..."Here, hold my beer, I wanna try something".... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boyd Posted July 9, 2017 Share Posted July 9, 2017 ...you start threads like this. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zombywoof Posted July 9, 2017 Share Posted July 9, 2017 What in the name of the Wide World of Sports are you talking about? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BluesKing777 Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 People Think You're Crazy When......... They see your guitar collection lined up in their cases and they truly hate guitar, guitar players and music but then suffer your blabbing and ask you to do a tune, a request, and then they talk all the way through the tune until you give up and stop, say: "Forget it, go away you imbeciles!" - (nice version) and go off to clean and polish your guitar and sulk a bit in your little music room waiting for them to leave and the Better Half comes in and says they have gone and then: "I have never seen that guitar before...when did you get that one? I thought you weren't getting any more silly guitars? Why are you hiding in here, you were pretty rude to them, but they left the gift they brought over for you out in the front room" BluesKing777. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OldCowboy Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 People Think You're Crazy When......... They see your guitar collection lined up in their cases and they truly hate guitar, guitar players and music but then suffer your blabbing and ask you to do a tune, a request, and then they talk all the way through the tune until you give up and stop, say: "Forget it, go away you imbeciles!" - (nice version) and go off to clean and polish your guitar and sulk a bit in your little music room waiting for them to leave and the Better Half comes in and says they have gone and then: "I have never seen that guitar before...when did you get that one? I thought you weren't getting any more silly guitars? Why are you hiding in here, you were pretty rude to them, but they left the gift they brought over for you out in the front room" BluesKing777. That is all too familiar, and the 'gift' is usually just a huge guilt trip😨 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fortyearspickn Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 ... you insist on ordering picks in large quantities to save money. get 72, save 72 cents.... So you have enough to leave in every drawer, on every shelf, and in every pocket - in case you need one in an emergency. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
E-minor7 Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 , , , , your guests discover what appears to be two identical twins and ask why and you tell them the white-ringed is more glazy and open like a sweet little sister where the black-ringed is tighter and louder like a tougher bigger brother and they see you light up a blissful smile while clapping them both simultanously on the shoulders for then to fire track 1 of Sgt. Pepper on max volume tho it's over midnite and the whole building sleeps in cute dreams of a brand new tomorrow and the vodka-cranium comes forward from underneath the armchair and you salute them welcome during Within You Without You and. . . . . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buc McMaster Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 I retract a previous statement. There is, in fact, something wrong with the forum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OldCowboy Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 ...You say " If we hadn't gone on that stupid cruise, I could have bought that guitar." (missed a good'n that time, too)😥 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BluesKing777 Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 You said when asked by the in-laws why you sold one of, to them, 5 identical guitars that the bracing was high and tall and you wanted scalloped bracing and the larger nut width of the....yada, yada, yada, because Murph, Zombi, Cowboy, Buc and Dan from the Forum preferred them like that and said they would be better with the..........., so.... as their eyes glaze over and a look passes between them and the Better Half.... so then after dinner you bring out the new one that cost 4 times the amount of the one you sold, to show them, play a tune or two - and to them it looks like, and sounds...you guessed....like another guitar exactly the same as the...... :mellow: BluesKing777. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jinder Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 , , , , your guests discover what appears to be two identical twins and ask why and you tell them the white-ringed is more glazy and open like a sweet little sister where the black-ringed is tighter and louder like a tougher bigger brother and they see you light up a blissful smile while clapping them both simultanously on the shoulders for then to fire track 1 of Sgt. Pepper on max volume tho it's over midnite and the whole building sleeps in cute dreams of a brand new tomorrow and the vodka-cranium comes forward from underneath the armchair and you salute them welcome during Within You Without You and. . . . . Your writing always puts me in mind of an angel-headed mix of Tom Wolfe and Kerouac...or that glorious monologue from Nighthawks At The Diner, at the denouement of which the protagonists "weave home, weave home, in the dark-warm, narcotic American night". Wonderful stuff! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jinder Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 People from my past thought I was crazy for needing more than one guitar. People from my present and future think I'm crazy for only having 11 guitars in the bedroom, and thoroughly endorse me adding to the collection... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blindboygrunt Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 Your writing always puts me in mind of an angel-headed mix of Tom Wolfe and Kerouac...or that glorious monologue from Nighthawks At The Diner, at the denouement of which the protagonists "weave home, weave home, in the dark-warm, narcotic American night". Wonderful stuff! Em7 always entertains with his musings and prose Writes better than most of us for who English as a first language Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BluesKing777 Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 Of course, a person with 30 or 40 guitars has hero status in some circles, small circles.... Trains spotting would be cheaper though. BluesKing777. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Proclaimer888 Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 You tell them a story for the 5th time and it's about people who they don't know, or are dead, or both. I'm just making sure they actually hear it and it's sinking in because it looks like they are too dense to absorb what I'm throwing down..... .....You try to explain to the fools.... 1) How good the movie Duck you Sucker is and 2)..the soundtrack is even better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorrisrownSal Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 Taking nothing away from Em7, BK is a loon, and writes in loon-style with authority. His posts in this thread are hysterical, and make me think of David Sedaris. I won't add to this thread, because it's been done so much better by the existing inmates. But we all crazy. True. I try to keep "my cray-cray" contained within this box of my life.... I am usually pretty good at that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blindboygrunt Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 Taking nothing away from Em7, BK is a loon, and writes in loon-style with authority. His posts in this thread are hysterical, and make me think of David Sedaris. I won't add to this thread, because it's been done so much better by the existing inmates. But we all crazy. True. I try to keep "my cray-cray" contained within this box of my life.... I am usually pretty good at that. David Sedaris is a favourite of mine , BBC broadcast a radio show of him reading excerpts from his diaries. Have tried to read them myself but it's his delivery which gets me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murph Posted July 10, 2017 Author Share Posted July 10, 2017 Too late--I can't unsee the poor little guy! 😂 He, he.... It was kind of funny in a tasteless way.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murph Posted July 10, 2017 Author Share Posted July 10, 2017 I retract a previous statement. There is, in fact, something wrong with the forum. Said the pot. To the kettle............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OldCowboy Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 ...you have a strap for each guitar, color coordinated with the giutar's finish and reserved for that guitar only. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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