dhanners623 Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Here's a new tune, "Dollar Store," although I dragged out my D-18 clone for it, instead of the J-35. It's still a work in progress and I'm not in love with my melody, so that might change. I come from a small town in East Central Illinois and when I was back there this summer, it seemed like it and all the other small towns around had a Dollar Store or a Family Dollar or a Dollar General. I read a couple of articles last week about the rise of these businesses, who often go into towns too small for a Walmart. Their business model is predicated (according to Wall Street) on there being a permanent underclass in America because of growing income disparity, disappearance of good-paying jobs in rural areas, etc. And, like Walmart and other big-box retailers, when these stores come to town, they undercut and drive out locally owned businesses, whose margins are usually pretty thin to begin with. http://m.youtube.com/watch?t=5s&v=0yAlimWExI4 Here are the lyrics: Dollar Store © 2017 by David Hanners This town is seniors and divorcees Most on some county relief Main Street’s boarded up or falling down But they say it's gonna turn around Get off work, hit the bank drive-through Wait in line is all I do Money’s gone before payday Take the kids to McDonald’s anyway (chorus:) So grab your coat, I’ll hold the door We’ll go to the Dollar Store We’ll go to the Dollar Store Need toilet paper, milk, microwave food Nowadays who’s got time to cook? Dollar’s stretched pretty tight Keeps Marie awake at night Some left town for the unknown We hung ‘round ‘cause it was home Ask her if it's worth it all Her expression’s blank as fresh drywall (Chorus) (bridge:) In the fields beyond the lights on the two-lane out of town They grow beans and corn Once could buy anything you need downtown Now we got the Dollar Store Old men and divorcees Wait for their check from the county Ghosts of Main Street seem resigned Don’t see it bouncing back in my lifetime In New York City some rich investor Bets on things not getting better Rich man always wants some more So he builds a Dollar Store (Chorus) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Murph Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Damn those capitalist. Risking their money in some dying little town where most of the residents left are receiving some form of Government subsidy. Spending weeks and weeks trying to hire enough people to run it who can pass a drug test, do rudimentary math, and not have nose rings and tattoos of zombies on their face. They should just shut it down and let Grandma do without toilet paper. Bahstards.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mickthemiller Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Woolworths springs to mind. Wasn't that the dime and ten cent store or something back in the 20s 30s? I live in the UK and it's the middle eastern immigrant population that seems to preserve the local business model. When I moved here 27 years ago you couldn't buy a carrot or a piece of fruit locally, now there are five or six small independent grocery stores, plus bakeries and pattiseries. In a 19th century song the rich man was in his castle, the poor man at his gate. Or the rich that gets the pleasure, the poor that gets the blame. Society never changed by singing about its ills. Ask Woody!! Nevertheless, your song's message is loud and clear. Fortunate that we are still able to express ourselves in song. Sorry, I just might be straying into the political!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OldCowboy Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Sign of the times, for sure. Like your song a lot (as usual) and can relate to the Dollar Store experience pretty well. They are convenient, however, and save gasoline if you happen to live in the boonies☺ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dhanners623 Posted November 9, 2017 Author Share Posted November 9, 2017 Damn those capitalist. Risking their money in some dying little town where most of the residents left are receiving some form of Government subsidy. Spending weeks and weeks trying to hire enough people to run it who can pass a drug test, do rudimentary math, and not have nose rings and tattoos of zombies on their face. They should just shut it down and let Grandma do without toilet paper. Bahstards.... Grandma would probably just have the kids drive to the Walmart over in Marshall to get the toilet paper and everything else she needs. Indeed, it is capitalism, but I'm not sure I see a line in the song criticizing or demeaning the stores or belittling their clientele. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fortyearspickn Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Old Five and Dimers like me remember the "5 & 10¢ Stores". Yes MickM, they were the Back to the Future equivalent of today's Dollar Stores. Woolworths was a higher end one: better stuff and a lunch counter. We've got a a new type store here one here - called "$5 and Up". More better stuff than the Dollar Store. There are lots of small towns that consist of only a Dollar Store, Gas Sation/Quick Check and a place to get your nails done with a Church or two. And dozens of abandoned buildings. They mostly suffered from declines in agriculture, not lapses in "capitalism". Back 150 years ago, towns died when the railroad passed them by. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneS Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Here's a new tune, "Dollar Store," although I dragged out my D-18 clone for it, instead of the J-35. It's still a work in progress and I'm not in love with my melody, so that might change. I come from a small town in East Central Illinois and when I was back there this summer, it seemed like it and all the other small towns around had a Dollar Store or a Family Dollar or a Dollar General. I read a couple of articles last week about the rise of these businesses, who often go into towns too small for a Walmart. Their business model is predicated (according to Wall Street) on there being a permanent underclass in America because of growing income disparity, disappearance of good-paying jobs in rural areas, etc. And, like Walmart and other big-box retailers, when these stores come to town, they undercut and drive out locally owned businesses, whose margins are usually pretty thin to begin with. http://m.youtube.com/watch?t=5s&v=0yAlimWExI4 Here are the lyrics: Dollar Store © 2017 by David Hanners This town is seniors and divorcees Most on some county relief Main Street’s boarded up or falling down But they say it's gonna turn around Get off work, hit the bank drive-through Wait in line is all I do Money’s gone before payday Take the kids to McDonald’s anyway (chorus:) So grab your coat, I’ll hold the door We’ll go to the Dollar Store We’ll go to the Dollar Store Need toilet paper, milk, microwave food Nowadays who’s got time to cook? Dollar’s stretched pretty tight Keeps Marie awake at night Some left town for the unknown We hung ‘round ‘cause it was home Ask her if it's worth it all Her expression’s blank as fresh drywall (Chorus) (bridge:) In the fields beyond the lights on the two-lane out of town They grow beans and corn Once could buy anything you need downtown Now we got the Dollar Store Old men and divorcees Wait for their check from the county Ghosts of Main Street seem resigned Don’t see it bouncing back in my lifetime In New York City some rich investor Bets on things not getting better Rich man always wants some more So he builds a Dollar Store (Chorus) Good song, as usual, and I know plenty of such stores and towns (though larger towns and cities just have more dollar stores). However, let me quibble with your choice of "divorcees," which I think is an outdated label that obscures and trivializes things. By giving us "seniors and divorcees" and "old men and divorcees" on the public dole, you (accidently, I hope) suggest that women are entitle to government aid because...they're divorced? That doesn't even make sense. (Believe me, if Marie had a choice between staying married and getting public funds, she might be thinking things over a bit...) If young women are waiting on a government check, it's not because they're divorced. In fact, marital status is not relevant to the issue. If they are waiting on a government check, it's more likely coming from the state child support enforcement agency (collecting what it can on behalf of children from non-paying fathers). I'm sure all kinds of women--married and unmarried, young and old, wait on relief funds, but women don't somehow, magically, get money from the government for being divorced. How is it that "seniors" and "old men" got away without the judgment-laden moniker? C'mon friend, don't reach for the "easy" tags; give us nuance and make us consider the lives of which you sing. (Sound of soapbox being kicked to the side now...) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duluthdan Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Good song, as usual, and I know plenty of such stores and towns (though larger towns and cities just have more dollar stores). However, let me quibble with your choice of "divorcees," which I think is an outdated label that obscures and trivializes things. By giving us "seniors and divorcees" and "old men and divorcees" on the public dole, you (accidently, I hope) suggest that women are entitle to government aid because...they're divorced? That doesn't even make sense. (Believe me, if Marie had a choice between staying married and getting public funds, she might be thinking things over a bit...) If young women are waiting on a government check, it's not because they're divorced. In fact, marital status is not relevant to the issue. If they are waiting on a government check, it's more likely coming from the state child support enforcement agency (collecting what it can on behalf of children from non-paying fathers). I'm sure all kinds of women--married and unmarried, young and old, wait on relief funds, but women don't somehow, magically, get money from the government for being divorced. How is it that "seniors" and "old men" got away without the judgment-laden moniker? C'mon friend, don't reach for the "easy" tags; give us nuance and make us consider the lives of which you sing. (Sound of soapbox being kicked to the side now...) David - Interesting song - in its initial stages I suspect. It will be one of those in the "write" perform, "re-write" perform, tweak, perform song processes. My last one took 3 years to get right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kelly campbell Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 I like it and I don't see it as sexist in anyway. Would there be a problem if he would have said "old women" instead of old men? Probably so. Everyone is just too sensitive these days, it is still just a song not a proposed law. Society needs to stop taking EVERYTHING so literal and listening for "dog whistle" meanings, sometimes they are just what they say, some women that are divorced and have kids who deserve and recieve public assistance. "single moms" would not fit. Oh well not trying to start a war just sharing my opinion. Go ahead and fire away Anne...I still like your music.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dhanners623 Posted November 9, 2017 Author Share Posted November 9, 2017 Good song, as usual, and I know plenty of such stores and towns (though larger towns and cities just have more dollar stores). However, let me quibble with your choice of "divorcees," which I think is an outdated label that obscures and trivializes things. By giving us "seniors and divorcees" and "old men and divorcees" on the public dole, you (accidently, I hope) suggest that women are entitle to government aid because...they're divorced? That doesn't even make sense. (Believe me, if Marie had a choice between staying married and getting public funds, she might be thinking things over a bit...) If young women are waiting on a government check, it's not because they're divorced. In fact, marital status is not relevant to the issue. If they are waiting on a government check, it's more likely coming from the state child support enforcement agency (collecting what it can on behalf of children from non-paying fathers). I'm sure all kinds of women--married and unmarried, young and old, wait on relief funds, but women don't somehow, magically, get money from the government for being divorced. How is it that "seniors" and "old men" got away without the judgment-laden moniker? C'mon friend, don't reach for the "easy" tags; give us nuance and make us consider the lives of which you sing. (Sound of soapbox being kicked to the side now...) I see what you are saying. I like to think I am sensitive to such issues, but please let me offer a couple of thoughts: 1) When I have a character narrating a song, as here, I believe the narration should be in the vernacular the protagonist would be prone to use. While the term "divorcee" may be considered archaic, it is not uncommon in rural areas. Similarly, it is not necessarily pejorative in this instance, I would posit. My original hope was to word it in a way that reflected single mothers, but I couldn't figure out how to do that. Maybe I need to rethink it. 2) It certainly was not my intent (or the protagonist's intent) to fault single women or seniors for receiving government assistance they rightfully qualify for, for whatever reason. Rather, it is an observation from the protagonist's point of view, and it underscores the challenging economic times some of the city's residents face. Capitalizing on those challenges is part of the budget chains' strategies, and I wanted to incorporate that into the song. A Bloomberg article on the chains, published Oct. 11, had this excerpt regarding the Dollar General chain: "The company declined to comment for this story, but in March 2016, Chief Executive Officer Todd Vasos outlined the chain’s '2020 Vision' for 125 investors gathered at a hotel in Nashville, south of the headquarters in suburban Goodlettsville, Tenn. (Shareholders include T. Rowe Price Associates, the Singapore sovereign wealth fund GIC, BlackRock, and Vanguard Group.) The presentation detailed a site-selection strategy focused on small towns, dubbed 'Anytown, USA.' Then Jim Thorpe, Dollar General’s chief merchandising officer at the time, defined the core customer for the investors: 'Our Best Friends Forever' —an extremely cash-strapped demographic, with a household income less than $35,000, and reliant on government assistance, that shops at Dollar General to 'stretch budgets.' Thorpe said these BFFs represented 21 percent of the chain’s shoppers and 43 percent of its sales. His final slide touted a goal of increasing sales 50 percent, to $30 billion, by 2020." (Emphasis added.) I am a product of rural Illinois -- a town of 2,700 -- and when I was back home this summer, I was struck by the town's demographics. It seemed like folks were either old (I qualify...) and/or divorced. It just seemed like there were a lot of divorced women with children. Census figures show that of the households with children present, 12 percent are led by a female householder with no husband. More than a third of the households -- 37 percent -- were individuals. Nearly one-quarter of the city's population, 23 percent, is 65 or older. Fifteen percent of the city's population lives at or below the poverty line, including 21 percent of those 18 or younger. It could well be I just don't know that many young people. I appreciate your thoughts and I hope all this provides some insight into my thinking. I may well need to recast the first couple of lines. As I said, it is a work in progress.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneS Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 I like it and I don't see it as sexist in anyway. Would there be a problem if he would have said "old women" instead of old men? Probably so. Everyone is just too sensitive these days, it is still just a song not a proposed law. Society needs to stop taking EVERYTHING so literal and listening for "dog whistle" meanings, sometimes they are just what they say, some women that are divorced and have kids who deserve and recieve public assistance. "single moms" would not fit. Oh well not trying to start a war just sharing my opinion. Go ahead and fire away Anne...I still like your music.. Thanks, Kelly ;) My issue is not around political correctness (or even around a debate about the underlying forces that result in the giving and receiving of public assistance). It's that I think the word is a huge distraction in the song lyric because it makes no sense and is, for this listener, a turn-off. I expect David would want to have the feedback, from a song crafting perspective, because I know it's easy, especially in the early stages, to miss stuff like this. Of course, he's free to leave it as is, with or without further ado; it's his song! I'm just one set of ears in the crowd. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blindboygrunt Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Why assume the divorcees are women ? Male divorcees ? And Anne arent there dishes need done ? 😂😂 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneS Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 I see what you are saying. I like to think I am sensitive to such issues, but please let me offer a couple of thoughts: 1) When I have a character narrating a song, as here, I believe the narration should be in the vernacular the protagonist would be prone to use. While the term "divorcee" may be considered archaic, it is not uncommon in rural areas. Similarly, it is not necessarily pejorative in this instance, I would posit. My original hope was to word it in a way that reflected single mothers, but I couldn't figure out how to do that. Maybe I need to rethink it. Totally agree and understand that it's the vernacular of your character that matters; but nowhere in my pretty vast experience of living in rural small towns (Wisconsin, Texas, North Carolina) have I lately (or ever) heard "divorcee," (except, maybe in a Doris Day movie? :)), so it doesn't ring true, to me, as a word this guy would use. My advice, fwiw, is to keep digging...even if you have to rearrange or invert something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneS Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Why assume the divorcees are women ? Male divorcees ? And Anne arent there dishes need done ? 😂😂 Yes...oh, and don't get up, luv; I'll bring you another beer... 😋 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dhanners623 Posted November 9, 2017 Author Share Posted November 9, 2017 Yes...oh, and don't get up, luv; I'll bring you another beer... �� Indeed, the word "divorcee" is, in definition, gender-neutral, applying to both men and women. But I will grant that in common usage it is often considered to be referring to women. And the song's protagonist means it to refer to women. I'm trying to think of a way to recast the first two lines of the song, but there is a lot those two lines have to accomplish. The lines must make reference to the town's demographics and the fact a number of the residents (of all ages, genders and marital status) receive some sort of government assistance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars68 Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 I liked the song. As a matter of fact, there is a Dollar Store opening soon here in my small town in Sweden (!!). We are lucky here, though, since my town has quite a few very succesful companies. So unemployment is extremely low right where I live, and most here would not be considered as Dollar Store target customers, if what you say about their business strategy is true, that is. With that said, I have seen the decline of small towns in Sweden too. The same economic forces are at work here as well. I wrote my own song sort of on the same topic a while back. I called it An Invisible Hand (referencing the market economy principle, as described by Adam Smith in the 1700s). My song is not as specific (or anywhere nearly as well written or performed) as yours, but if you care to have a listen you can find it here. Unfortunately I don't write, sing, or play as well as you do... By the way, English is not my first language, but I kind of see the point Anne is making about the word divorcee. Something to consider perhaps? Lars Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kelly campbell Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 Yes...oh, and don't get up, luv; I'll bring you another beer... 😋 LOL Now there is a real woman...funny stuff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dhanners623 Posted November 10, 2017 Author Share Posted November 10, 2017 Sign of the times, for sure. Like your song a lot (as usual) and can relate to the Dollar Store experience pretty well. They are convenient, however, and save gasoline if you happen to live in the boonies☺ That's pretty much the story in my hometown. It's also why I wanted to make sure not to sound like I am dissing the stores' clientele; heck, I've even shopped at a Dollar Store (or maybe it was Family Dollar...) a few times. There used to be one a block from where my late father lived. Even shopped at one from time to time when we lived in St. Paul. When something is convenient, "quality" or brand names are considerations that can take a back seat. Then again, living in the Arab world for the past three years, my calculation of "quality" has been wildly recalibrated.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dhanners623 Posted November 10, 2017 Author Share Posted November 10, 2017 Totally agree and understand that it's the vernacular of your character that matters; but nowhere in my pretty vast experience of living in rural small towns (Wisconsin, Texas, North Carolina) have I lately (or ever) heard "divorcee," (except, maybe in a Doris Day movie? :)), so it doesn't ring true, to me, as a word this guy would use. My advice, fwiw, is to keep digging...even if you have to rearrange or invert something. Have been playing around with the first two lines. Are these any better? This town is seniors and single moms And tired people who work two jobs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnneS Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 Have been playing around with the first two lines. Are these any better? This town is seniors and single moms And tired people who work two jobs 👍🏻👍🏻 I like that a lot. I'll bet getting the rhyme with "jobs" improves the sing-ability of that line, too. Also, this has the protagonist including himself as a part of the town, which makes him even more trustworthy (as a narrator) and makes the whole set up work for me. Now, I want to hear what he has to say. Funny how adjusting a few syllables can unlock the mystery... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dhanners623 Posted November 16, 2017 Author Share Posted November 16, 2017 Edited the song and even came up with a melody I like better. I may post a video later, but here are the revised lyrics: Dollar Store © 2017 by David Hanners Main Street’s boarded up or falling down But they say it's gonna turn around This town is seniors and single moms Most on relief, a few have jobs My paycheck’s gone before payday Take the kids to McDonald’s anyway Grab your coat, I’ll hold the door We’ll go to the Dollar Store Toilet paper, milk, microwave food These days who’s got time to cook? Time and money stretched too tight What you think about when you’re up at night Wonder if it's worth it all Your expression’s blank as fresh drywall Grab your coat, I’ll hold the door We’ll go to the Dollar Store In the fields beyond the lights on the two-lane out of town They grow beans and corn Once could buy anything you need downtown Now all we got is the Dollar Store This town is old folks and the dispossessed Single moms on TANF Ghosts of Main Street seem resigned Don’t see it bouncing back in my lifetime On Wall Street some sharp investor Bets on things not getting better Rich man always wants some more So he builds a Dollar Store Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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