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flyingfrets

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This sounds about as bad as it can get - are you able to lie down?

 

My best wishes to you. Any way I/we might be of any help......

 

Keep us posted.

 

I hope you will find retirement peaceful and relaxing, though it does feel strange some days to begin with.

 

All the best

 

JohnM

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Yes, jdgm, I can lay down...carefully. Getting up is more of an issue right now. I can turn my head without screaming this morning, so there's progress. That's why I said I'm just trying to "power through it." The radiation at this particular spot is excruciating (odd cause it's never bothered me before), but as long as it's killing the cancer encapsulated in this bone, I'm good with it. Figuring the pain should eventually subside and there'll be one less cancerous area to worry about.

 

L8_4thesh0w...it's funny but I don't feel very strong or courageous. I mostly feel scared & angry at this point. Not in the "Woe is me" sense...it's more, "Oh come on - isn't enough enough?" But the anger & frustration is what keeps me going and fighting.

 

But thanks for the concern, advice and thoughts...

 

Don

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Wow. I haven't read through a whole thread like this in a long time.

 

I had no idea so much was going on.

 

I did have an idea that there are some truly great souls on this forum.

 

Obviously, I am way late to the thread, and much of what I would say has been said. I hope it goes without saying, you have my prayers, along with all those here in this thread.

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Hello all!

 

Again, thanks for the thoughts and prayers. Just an update...

 

Began narrow field, high dose radiation at the T7 vertebrae (slightly above dead center between the shoulder blades) last Tuesday. Was thankful that was the next area scheduled for treatment because I'd noticed (particularly when driving) that when I leaned against the seat back, I could actually feel swelling. Not sure if it was expansion in the bone just prior to another compression fracture, or if it was just inflammation in the affected area, but it was awfully uncomfortable. The pain radiating from it spread across the upper back and into the shoulder sockets themselves, so moving had become pretty painful.

 

Since radiation began, the pain has been excruciating. I can't tell if the bone finally fractured, but immediately after treatment, it feels kike someone holding a blow-torch to my upper spine coupled with pinched nerves on both sides. Literally takes my breath away if I move certain ways, so they're throwing more pain-killers at it (40 mg oxycontin 2X a day, 20 mg oxycodone every 4 hours for break-through pain, flexeril for muscle spasms and Decadron, a steroid for inflammation). Folks are amazed that I can even stand up let alone function, but I gotta do what I gotta do and I can't let pain or medication stand in my way.

 

2 more treatments left on T7 before they move down to T11 and while they're exceedingly painful, I just try to visualize the radiation killing the cancer cells and the pain becomes a little more bearable.

 

Returning to work on Tuesday to tie up some loose ends and get a new shop steward trained and up to speed before I go into medical retirement on October first. In some ways, I'm looking forward to the cessation of battling with central office management, but I will miss my colleagues and co-workers.

 

All things considered though, I think I'm ready to get out of there.

 

God bless all...

Don

Hi Don, I'm sorry to read that you are in such pain.

My wish to you is that you will be pain free and the treatment destroys the cancer cells.

I admire your honesty and determination in fighting this cancer.

You are always in my prayers and good vibes.

 

Kind regards, Emma

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Hope you got the Shop Steward up to speed and are now confident you will leave your colleagues in good hands until you get back to them.

Oct.1st is just around the corner. Here's hoping the rest will do you the power of good, FF.

 

Best wishes to all.

 

P.

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Thank you & God Bless to everyone who's posted.

 

Just came home from another week in-patient. More compression fractures (spine & sternum...feels like some broken ribs too). Meds not managing pain much so they're boosting me up gradually till it's under control. Radiation still ongoing, but getting on & off the table is a real trick with the severely hampered mobility.

 

Still fighting but dear God, it just doesn't seem to stop. Don't know what else to say...

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oh man. I can only imagine that'd be like having been in a car accident without seatbelt or airbag - very hard to manage chest/rib pain without being immobile.

Hope the painkillers give you relief and you have the opportunity for some peaceful rest - though I'm guessing rest might be losing its appeal after so many weeks.

You have amazing strength Don. Sincerely hoping the coming days are better.

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Your a man dude. Fighting like you are. I know you dont have a lot of options but to fight this. but Still, a lot of guys would of lied down and quit. you have my props man.

 

Look up bad a** in the dictionary there is an 8 x 10 glossy of you.

 

Your in my prayers. Someday if I have to go through the same thing, I hope I can fight it like you

 

I bow to you sir.

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Thank you & God Bless to everyone who's posted.

 

Just came home from another week in-patient. More compression fractures (spine & sternum...feels like some broken ribs too). Meds not managing pain much so they're boosting me up gradually till it's under control. Radiation still ongoing, but getting on & off the table is a real trick with the severely hampered mobility.

 

Still fighting but dear God, it just doesn't seem to stop. Don't know what else to say...

Hi Don, thank you for taking the time and energy to post on here. I can't even begin to comprehend what you are going through. But your determination and strength shine through in your posts.

You are in my thoughts and I pray for you to be healed.

 

kind regards, Emma

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  • 3 weeks later...

Flyingfrets,

 

I'm so sorry that you didn't get better news. :( It's totally ok to be scared, I dare you to find someone who wouldn't be scared receiving news like that! Don't let the fear take over and fight as hard as you can! If you must come to Philadelphia, you will be in good hands as there are at least two top notch facilities here for cancer treatment: Fox Chase Cancer Center and The Hospital of University of Pennsylvania.

 

Depending on your insurance carrier, look on their website for Clinical Bulletins which can help you figure out if, and under what circumstances, your treatment protocol may or may not be covered. Do your research now so that you won't have to stress over it later. Also, if your Doctor told you where he would be referring you to, call that facility and tell them what your situation is and what insurance you have in order to see if they can assist you in getting your treatments approved.

 

You are in my thoughts and prayers that things will improve for you. Stay strong!

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