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Groove visits the forum.

 

Not to flatter, but that thing moves. Nice progression- don't know if you're going for a George Jones sound in your lower vocal range using the d minor, but I bet your vocals would match the power level of the instruments if maybe capo 4, or perhaps done in a-minor?

 

Of course, the challenge would be to give us the "unplugged" acoustic version ; ). Great job- appreciate the energy on that recording.

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Cha Ching and Bingo... !

 

DISREGARD THIS BELOW, I SEE AN IDENTICAL COMMENT ON SOUNDCLOUD, SO I GUESS YOU LIKE THE SONG LOL.

 

Murph, can you explain what you meant? I don't know if you are replying about the song or a previous comment and I am just not sure what you mean anyway. (I ask because all comments have merit, but only if I understand them, lol.)

 

I ask for feedback because I have dozens of recorded songs with the goal to release albums and I have to figure out which ones stand out. Of course, I understand that people have different tastes in music. You just have to get some feedback best you can.

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Groove visits the forum.

 

Not to flatter, but that thing moves. Nice progression- don't know if you're going for a George Jones sound in your lower vocal range using the d minor, but I bet your vocals would match the power level of the instruments if maybe capo 4, or perhaps done in a-minor?

 

Of course, the challenge would be to give us the "unplugged" acoustic version ; ). Great job- appreciate the energy on that recording.

 

If you mean to sing it four half steps or more higher, no way could I pull that off. I am no songbird, lol. I couldn't sing it that high. I always do a LOT of work to identify the proper key for me to sing a song in. It takes a lot of experimentation and advice/agreement from a trusted musician/producer. Problem being, I don't have that high a range. It is what it is, lol. I would give anything to have a broader range. It's definitely gotten better since I have sang so much over the past 15 years, and have had some tips from pros but I am still very limited. I just hope to write good songs and pull it off well enough.

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If you mean to sing it four half steps or more higher, no way could I pull that off. I am no songbird, lol. I couldn't sing it that high. I always do a LOT of work to identify the proper key for me to sing a song in. It takes a lot of experimentation and advice/agreement from a trusted musician/producer. Problem being, I don't have that high a range. It is what it is, lol. I would give anything to have a broader range. It's definitely gotten better since I have sang so much over the past 15 years, and have had some tips from pros but I am still very limited. I just hope to write good songs and pull it off well enough.

 

That makes sense. I've just listened to all of your SoundCloud tracks, and that does seem to be your natural vocal range. I'm no songwriter, but your "Legacy" is a good one, and really gives insight into a part of the songwriter's world. Why are many of the tracks noted as being "Nashville"? Were those recorded there? That would certainly explain the solid backup players and female vocals.

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That makes sense. I've just listened to all of your SoundCloud tracks, and that does seem to be your natural vocal range. I'm no songwriter, but your "Legacy" is a good one, and really gives insight into a part of the songwriter's world. Why are many of the tracks noted as being "Nashville"? Were those recorded there? That would certainly explain the solid backup players and female vocals.

 

Yes, if you hear a full band on my songs, they were recorded in Nashville with world-class session musicians. If the song sucks, it's not their fault, my 'band' is amazing. Whatever is on that page (which changes pretty regularly) is a small fraction of what I have recorded. Problem is choosing the lineup for the first release; it drives me nuts. We could say that is a good problem but it really is very difficult.

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Nicely done, Bill. The production is excellent, as one should expect from hired guns in the studio. Moves along nicely musically. I must confess that lyrically it seems thin.......there's very little story, not much for the listener's imagination to....well......imagine. The native son is born and the native son dies, seemingly without having done much in between except get old.......and die. What did he see, what did he do, what might he have felt, what were his circumstances? Only my two cents, but I think the story could be fleshed out more to good effect.

 

Write on, brother!

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Nicely done, Bill. The production is excellent, as one should expect from hired guns in the studio. Moves along nicely musically. I must confess that lyrically it seems thin.......there's very little story, not much for the listener's imagination to....well......imagine. The native son is born and the native son dies, seemingly without having done much in between except get old.......and die. What did he see, what did he do, what might he have felt, what were his circumstances? Only my two cents, but I think the story could be fleshed out more to good effect.

 

Write on, brother!

 

The song idea came from my love of native American history since I was a kid, and a friend's discovery of a burial site (human remains and burial gifts in the grave) on his land. The idea was to write about a native american being born and lifting the infant to the sun and then have a long solo break to (hopefully) infer passage of time and then this infant has become an elder, he dies and they, once again, lift him to the sun. Kind of a tribute to the simplicity of native American life. The song is also being considered for an album I have written that deals with religion, the rejection of same and the search for 'truth.' The idea being that bringing the simple native American concept of sun worship into it could add an important element. Beyond that, songs with sparse lyrics are VERY difficult to pull off. I don't know if it works, that's why I ask, lol. We'll see.

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......have a long solo break to (hopefully) infer passage of time......

Oh. The inference went right past me........didn't perceive the solo as the life and times of the native son.

 

 

Beyond that, songs with sparse lyrics are VERY difficult to pull off.

If "sparse" means "very few words", I disagree. If "sparse" means "not much to go on"......I still disagree.

 

Good writers can deliver a solid, complete lyrical concept with very few phrases......very few words for that matter. On the other hand, paragraphs can be written that convey almost nothing without much difficulty. We seem to come from different schools of thought on lyric writing......and that's okay! It's a very personal endeavor and has many different, valid approaches. And, as I mentioned elsewhere, the only opinion that really matters is ones' own........if others dig it that's icing on the cake!

 

You've been kicking this album idea around for awhile now........getting close?

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DISREGARD THIS BELOW, I SEE AN IDENTICAL COMMENT ON SOUNDCLOUD, SO I GUESS YOU LIKE THE SONG LOL.

 

Murph, can you explain what you meant?

 

Cha ching is the sound of a cash register.

 

It's good.

 

Boom!

 

Bingo!

 

I love it.

 

P.S. The identical comment on Soundcloud was me...............

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Took it again in the cans and enjoyed it more. The guitar friggin' nails it.

I see that electric tour de force in the middle as the picture of the mans life - first verse bein' the beginning, last the end.

And like the fact that it's withheld volume wise (know it's a rough state).

 

Nothing to do with this branch of the Forum, but I think the track could benefit from an acoustic 6-string down in the mix -

sometimes clear, others just as percussive glue beside the tambourine. It should correspond with the thunderous drums - strummed, , could f-picked fast.

Also suggest an extra touch of effect on the vox to make it blend 1 hair better into the band.

 

May sound like Mr. Tooclever here, but it's not easy to create serious dramatic music without overdoin' it with the chance of ending in the opposite ditch - the comical one.

A bit like film-making, I assume.

You manage splendidly, , , and I buy the 'illusion' all the way, feeling like hailing this prairie-soul too.

 

As said in the second line of this post, the song works like a monument for the Indian - a standing stone, , , a ROCK

 

 

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I'm stumbling over the line about 'one last harvest moon' setting on a bright sunny autumn day. A harvest moon is a full moon and, so, sets at sunrise...not usually considered to be the 'bright sunny" part of the day. I can't feel or see the imagery that way.

Good groove, though---

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E-minor7, yes, we are not done with this. We have acoustic guitar in there but I can't even hear it in this mix. But I have hearing loss. I have two mixes, and this was the best one. But anyway, it is def not put to bed yet. Mixing is an art in and of itself. This is a 'rough mix.' I have also toyed with other 'additions' that I don't even know are needed. I don't want to say too much, fearing I might influence comments. I'd rather just hear what people think at this point.

 

Thanks to all of you for the comments, it helps.

 

Buc, the album was to be finished three years ago but my mother died very unexpectedly in the middle of it all, and that changed everything. Getting back on track now, having fun revisiting all the songs and digging in with my engineer.

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I'm stumbling over the line about 'one last harvest moon' setting on a bright sunny autumn day. A harvest moon is a full moon and, so, sets at sunrise...not usually considered to be the 'bright sunny" part of the day. I can't feel or see the imagery that way.

Good groove, though---

 

Yep, I looked at my files, back to the original lyric sheet and there is an error. It was originally written as "One last harvest moon has set, it's a bright, sunny autumn day." I don't know how "it's" became "on" for the lyric sheet that went to the studio. I have been known to forget a lyric and have to write it out from memory at the studio, lol.

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