KSG_Standard Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 The post about zombies got me thinking about chainsaws...which reminded me of the stupidest thing I've ever done. What's the stupidest thing you've ever done? Don't be shy, because it'll be hard to top my story. I bought some land in Colorado in 1999 and I wanted to clear a road across the property. So, I went out and bought a really nice Stihl chainsaw...did you know that you can buy a chainsaw without having to take an IQ test or any training classes? I went down to my land for a long weekend of lumber jacking and chainsaw therapy. I successfully managed to cut down a few large pine trees and even had them fall where I wanted them to. Just before I had to leave, I thought I'd cut down one more very large tree...about 2 1/2 feet around and 80-100 feet tall...so I made all the proper cuts into the tree trunk and the tree didn't fall down. Instead the tree stayed standing with my new chainsaw pinched in between the two cut halves and just stood there. I pushed on the tree, beat it with an axe, yelled at it and it refused to fall. I didn't want to leave my new chainsaw stuck in the tree, so I maneuvered my '98 Tahoe through the woods to what I thought was a good spot, tied one end of a rope to the tow hook on the front of the truck, walked over to the tree and tied the other end of the rope to the tree. I thought that I was far enough away from the tree to be safe, I started the Tahoe and ever so gently backed up a little bit...the chainsaw fell out of the tree...the plan was working! All of a sudden, without any warning the tree started to fall...I watched it in slow motion as it fell towards me...It turns out that I wasn't quite far enough away from the tree...the crown of the giant tree landed on top of my Tahoe with a tremendous crack. The tree blew out my windshield, the back window and smashed the hood and roof...and scared the crap out of me. I had to drive home from Pagosa Springs to Denver (about 260 miles) without a windshield or back window. I had my chainsaw though! I had to explain to my wife what happened and I told the insurance company that a tree branch had fallen on my truck...I didn't give the insurance company any of the details about how that had happened. I have not used the chainsaw since then, it's still in new condition. I was sober at the time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harmonicchaos Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 signing up for the forums is the biggest one I can think of right now... I spend too much time here! I know there's something worse, but that's what first came to mind... that may just be because I'm on the forums right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AXE® Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Killed a man in Reno. Just to watch him die. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Californiaman Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Killed a man in Reno.Just to watch him die. LMAO! That's funny. Cash. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Californiaman Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 First day on the job at Lee Vining High School in the Eastern Sierras. I walked in to a room full of women who were gathered around a computer screen trying to figure something out. I said, "Good morning ladies. How's everyone doing." The gal at the computer turned to look at me and noticed that my fly was open. I was wearing boxers and had no idea my mule was hanging out. The principal, who was standing there also noticed and told me so. Wow. Talk about a great first impression. Hello, nice to me meet you and Crol the Warrior King Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
:oilpit: Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Shrooms That sh!t really F's you up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saturn Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I've done so many dumb things, it's a miracle I'm still alive and relatively unscathed. One dumb thing I clearly remember doing can be somewhat forgiven because I was so young. It was New Years day and I was about 6 years old. The night before my dad shot a few rounds into the ground during the midnight celebration. Well I found an unspent shell on the lawn. I took the bullet down to the front of my yard and layed it on the sidewalk pointing down the road. I got a large rock and climbed up the fence and dropped the rock on the bullet on the sidewalk. It exploded, but I have no idea where the bullet flew. It didn't hit me and to my knowledge didn't hit anything else either.:- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dem00n Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I got aressted for stealing...im ****ing idoit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EVH5445 Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I jumped off a roof once. Hit the ground and my legs kept going lied there for a couple minutes then got up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boston004681 Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I'll keep mine secret. I bought some land in Colorado in 1999 and I wanted to clear a road across the property. So' date=' I went out and bought a really nice Stihl chainsaw...did you know that you can buy a chainsaw without having to take an IQ test or any training classes? I went down to my land for a long weekend of lumber jacking and chainsaw therapy. I successfully managed to cut down a few large pine trees and even had them fall where I wanted them to. Just before I had to leave, I thought I'd cut down one more very large tree...about 2 1/2 feet around and 80-100 feet tall...so I made all the proper cuts into the tree trunk and the tree didn't fall down. Instead the tree stayed standing with my new chainsaw pinched in between the two cut halves and just stood there. I pushed on the tree, beat it with an axe, yelled at it and it refused to fall. I didn't want to leave my new chainsaw stuck in the tree, so I maneuvered my '98 Tahoe through the woods to what I thought was a good spot, tied one end of a rope to the tow hook on the front of the truck, walked over to the tree and tied the other end of the rope to the tree. I thought that I was far enough away from the tree to be safe, I started the Tahoe and ever so gently backed up a little bit...the chainsaw fell out of the tree...the plan was working! All of a sudden, without any warning the tree started to fall...I watched it in slow motion as it fell towards me...It turns out that I wasn't quite far enough away from the tree...the crown of the giant tree landed on top of my Tahoe with a tremendous crack. The tree blew out my windshield, the back window and smashed the hood and roof...and scared the crap out of me. I had to drive home from Pagosa Springs to Denver (about 260 miles) without a windshield or back window. I had my chainsaw though! I had to explain to my wife what happened and I told the insurance company that a tree branch had fallen on my truck...I didn't give the insurance company any of the details about how that had happened. I have not used the chainsaw since then, it's still in new condition. I was sober at the time...[/quote'] That's hard to top!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boston004681 Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I jumped off a roof once. Hit the ground and my legs kept going lied there for a couple minutes then got up. ??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harmonicchaos Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I got aressted for stealing...im ****ing idoit. the problem there being that you got caught What did ya steal? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeoConMan Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 ShroomsThat sh!t really F's you up Wow. Yeah' date=' 1982 for me. I STILL remember that sh!t! It doesn't go away when you get tired of it. Long day and night.... Boned a cop's wife for awhile in Texas. I had just happened to get transferred to another job 60 miles away the weekend he found out. Chased a tornado in Kansas, it wound up chasing me. Car got stuck in the mud when I was turning around. Escaped both by the Grace Of God. I know this for a fact because I ain't [b']that[/b] lucky and I ain't that smart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
:oilpit: Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Wow. Yeah' date=' 1982 for me. I STILL remember that sh!t! It doesn't go away when you get tired of it. Long day and night....[/quote'] I was with 3 friends, and it was all good until one of them got scared, then everything went to hell We were in a room with a HDTV, a few video game consoles, a few high end guitars and a laptop luckily we only broke, a bean bag chair, a shirt, 2 phones and a bowl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dem00n Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 the problem there being that you got caught :) What did ya steal? A DS (handheld consle) the kid i stole it from was...well lets just say his mom misses him. (JK) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AXE® Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Drove Drunk and got caught. Grateful I didn't kill someone or my self... Stupidest thing I've ever done... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dem00n Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I was with 3 friends' date=' and it was all good until one of them got scared, then everything went to hell We were in a room with a HDTV, a few video game consoles, a few high end guitars and a laptop luckily we only broke, a bean bag chair, a shirt, 2 phones and a bowl[/quote'] Sucks for the bowl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riffster Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Recently?...I took out the trash out on 30 degree weather and locked myself out of the house, I was wearing sleep wear and some fluffy shoes. No key, no cell phone, no way back in. The only neighbor at home was my brand new neighbor, so I had to go in their house ask for their phone, call my wife, wait in their living room in my freakin' pajamas for 30 minutes and be just as f**king charming as I could be under the circumstances. More recently? my wife thinks I am crazy for how close I get with my car to the edge of the doorway in our garage. I am taunting her and I get real close, I even put my finger between the side mirror and the wall, that close, too close so I back out to be able to open the door on my car and as I back out I turn the steering wheel ever so slightly to the wrong side. The side mirror pretty much exploded after snapping... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FennRx Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 being a christian. that one is for ksg. :) ***just kidding lord, don't smite me!**** Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlekenny Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I was with 3 friends' date=' and it was all good until one of them got scared, then everything went to hell We were in a room with a HDTV, a few video game consoles, a few high end guitars and a laptop luckily we only broke, a bean bag chair, a shirt, 2 phones and a bowl[/quote'] wow, must've been quite the adventure Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steven Tari Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Me and the crew were flying high one night and decided to go into a rivel bar. I was sitten at the bar when a young prospect decided he didn't like the way I looked. He came over and started some stuff. I got tired of the mouth and punched him. Well the pansey came out with a 25 from his coat and told me he was going to blow my head off. I being full of different ingredents that night was Bonzi brave and told him that he was a puss. Told him he didn't have the jewels to pull the trigger. it went on for about ten minutes. I don't know who was more surprised, him or me when the gun went off. He had it in my shoulder area when it went off, clean in and out. While in shock over being shot his crew got him out of the bar real fast. Every one thought that I had lost it because I was laughen my butt off. Hey what could I say I was the one who egged him on to do it. NOT COOL TO RAZZ A FOOL WITH A GUN. Also stay out of rival bars unless you have a death wish. /LATER Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Mick Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I can't think what would be the stupidest too many choices Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carbonite Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 When I was young, we were playing Frisbee in a parking lot near our house. It was night so it was empty. I was running to catch a toss and obviously I was watching the Frisbee. Turned around just in time to plant my face into a metal pole holding up the parking lot lights. Yeah, I was flat on my back for an hour. Must have been about 13 or 14. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
grampa Posted March 11, 2009 Share Posted March 11, 2009 I've spent years of therapy and gallons of liquor to just forget her name. Thanks for getting me to think about it again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KSG_Standard Posted March 11, 2009 Author Share Posted March 11, 2009 I've spent years of therapy and gallons of liquor to just forget her name. Thanks for getting me to think about it again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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