Sgt. Pepper 1,396 Posted April 7 Report Share Posted April 7 1 hour ago, Pinch said: Leftover breadsticks There should never be any. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sgt. Pepper 1,396 Posted April 7 Report Share Posted April 7 1 hour ago, Pinch said: Leftover breadsticks There should never be any. Vegetable Lasagna? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sgt. Pepper 1,396 Posted April 7 Report Share Posted April 7 Semi-pro? Are you a pro or not, there is no half way. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
fortyearspickn 499 Posted April 8 Author Report Share Posted April 8 Sarge likes "Old Wives Tails". (Just sayin') Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Natural 276 Posted April 8 Report Share Posted April 8 Old wives tails might get one in trouble. I prefer old EX-wives tails. (Not my own ex-wives - other guys old ex-wives). Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sgt. Pepper 1,396 Posted April 8 Report Share Posted April 8 Double Negative. Isn't it really just a positive. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ghost_of_fl 448 Posted April 8 Report Share Posted April 8 2 hours ago, fortyearspickn said: Sarge likes "Old Wives Tails". (Just sayin') If your wife has a tail, you're dating the wrong species. There are no tall tails, only tall tales to tell. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sgt. Pepper 1,396 Posted April 8 Report Share Posted April 8 8 hours ago, ghost_of_fl said: If your wife has a tail, you're dating the wrong species. There are no tall tails, only tall tales to tell. I checked my wife has no tail. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Whitefang 340 Posted April 8 Report Share Posted April 8 Can someone be "plussed" as opposed to "nonplussed"? "Recked" as opposed to "reckless"? And I once heard a guy describe some girl as "pretty ugly"! And another say, "I didn't like that movie. It was pretty gross." Is a dog's life really all that bad? Personally, I've never had a rug lie to me. And just how much IS a sh!tload? Whitefang Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Natural 276 Posted April 8 Report Share Posted April 8 On 4/7/2021 at 8:29 AM, merciful-evans said: which way up is 'down' again? Speaking of up and down; I still am not sure what the difference is between "uptown" and "downtown". 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Natural 276 Posted April 8 Report Share Posted April 8 One of George Carlin's favorites - jumbo shrimp. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Whitefang 340 Posted April 8 Report Share Posted April 8 Heh! One of my favorite Carlin's! Whitefang 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ghost_of_fl 448 Posted April 8 Report Share Posted April 8 2 hours ago, Mr. Natural said: One of George Carlin's favorites - jumbo shrimp. Steven Wright had some like that. "Why do we park on the driveway and drive on the parkway?" 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
fortyearspickn 499 Posted April 9 Author Report Share Posted April 9 On 4/8/2021 at 6:00 AM, Sgt. Pepper said: I checked my wife has no tail. Sounds like a tall tale... just sayin'. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
fortyearspickn 499 Posted April 9 Author Report Share Posted April 9 Hey, Sarge. In the Coast Guard - did you all have a "Work Party" when taking on supplies in port? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Whitefang 340 Posted April 9 Report Share Posted April 9 Back to puerility........ Why do we say we "Took" a crap when we're actually LEAVING some? Same goes for a bath. Whitefang Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ghost_of_fl 448 Posted April 9 Report Share Posted April 9 I worked for a company that wanted to make a new website for their "Spa and Retail Store". So the Marketing dept. came up with: [company name]sparetailstore.com It was with great delight that my department pointed out to Marketing that "sparetailstore" in a URL can read as "spare tail store". 😂 Here is a similar problem: "kid sex change". 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Pinch 499 Posted April 9 Report Share Posted April 9 46 minutes ago, ghost_of_fl said: I worked for a company that wanted to make a new website for their "Spa and Retail Store". So the Marketing dept. came up with: [company name]sparetailstore.com It was with great delight that my department pointed out to Marketing that "sparetailstore" in a URL can read as "spare tail store". 😂 Here is a similar problem: "kid sex change". Apparently, that topic is a topic of discussion these days... I think maybe we should leave gender corrective surgery until people have at least gone through puberty? But, of course, I realize the headlines are a case of a very few extremists trying to get a rise out of people and succeeding. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Whitefang 340 Posted April 10 Report Share Posted April 10 23 hours ago, ghost_of_fl said: "kid sex change". Even taken as intended it suggests to parents a place to get a "trade-in". ( "I'll give you this bratty boy in exchange for two little girls." ) . Whitefang Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Whitefang 340 Posted April 16 Report Share Posted April 16 This is no game to these siblings! Whitefang 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ghost_of_fl 448 Posted April 22 Report Share Posted April 22 Why are buildings called buildings when they are already built? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
sparquelito 835 Posted April 22 Report Share Posted April 22 "Hey Jim, that girl you were buying drinks for at the bar last Friday night...." "Yeah?" "How did things go?" "Good, I guess. Yeah, I took her home." "Ah. You are trending toward the big girls lately, I notice." "Big?" (looks around) "She was more than big. She was obeast!" 😬 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Whitefang 340 Posted April 24 Report Share Posted April 24 On 4/22/2021 at 6:32 PM, sparquelito said: "She was more than big. She was obeast!" 😬 My wife, despite being born in Laredo Texas, learned Spanish before English (for some reason) and ended many words with a "t" when one wasn't originally in the word. And I actually did hear her once say "obeast" instead of "obese" several times. Whitefang 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
merciful-evans 1,086 Posted April 26 Report Share Posted April 26 On 4/22/2021 at 11:24 PM, ghost_of_fl said: Why are buildings called buildings when they are already built? Buildings are baby builds. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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