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Losing a Friend


brad1
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The past few days have been tough for me, and even tougher for my cat Sydney.  She did not eat much yesterday or the day before.  And today she has eaten nothing I give her. 

I know there are some of you that don't like cats. I never thought I liked them either. Until I got one at age 52.  And then she became a wonderful companion to me and has been for the last 17 + years. 

Right now I am very lucky that I am not working. So I can be with her.  I'm a teacher and start school at a new job in about 3 weeks.

I knew this would be hard to deal with, but it is harder than I imagined.  It is really tearing me apart inside.  And it will only get worse when she passes.

 

How have you guys dealt with the loss of a pet? Any suggestions or advice on how to get through it?

Thanks

 

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Yes, I have been there too..  I had Brutus for many years. He was the closest thing I will ever have to having a child. But actually more than that as he was my friend and someone to share life with as such..  He lived till he was 19, still playing like a kitten until the last month or so..  Then as said, he stopped eating..  Then he would leave the house much more than he did... Which is the real sign. They know when its their time. This went on for about two weeks until I decided to take him to the vet where they said he had lost over half of his weight since he was in last and that it was time. And they put him down there an then.. Was one of the most upsetting things I have ever had to do. BUT  I also know it was the right thing to do so that he did not suffer any more than he had too.

Its been like a decade since he went. I still miss him and think about him almost every day..   😞   

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2 hours ago, kelly campbell said:

Sorry to hear this and I hope everything gets better soon.  I am a dog person but like all animals I understand the feelings.

Thank you. I always thought I was just a dog lover. I grew up with one. But after becoming attached to my Sydney, I really did become a true animal lover. I see the value in all animals. And how much they mean to all of us.

51 minutes ago, jaxson50 said:

We build strong bonds with our pets,  and it hurts so much when they leave us, it can seem silly till it happens to you.. 

The hurt is worth it. 

You bet it is. I can not imagine my life without her for the past 17 years. She has brought so much happiness to my life. 

Your words are so true. Thank you.

30 minutes ago, Rabs said:

Yes, I have been there too..  I had Brutus for many years. He was the closest thing I will ever have to having a child. But actually more than that as he was my friend and someone to share life with as such..  He lived till he was 19, still playing like a kitten until the last month or so..  Then as said, he stopped eating..  Then he would leave the house much more than he did... Which is the real sign. They know when its their time. This went on for about two weeks until I decided to take him to the vet where they said he had lost over half of his weight since he was in last and that it was time. And they put him down there an then.. Was one of the most upsetting things I have ever had to do. BUT  I also know it was the right thing to do so that he did not suffer any more than he had too.

Its been like a decade since he went. I still miss him and think about him almost every day..   😞   

 

 

Wow, 19!

He looks very cool. I bet he was a great companion to you.

Yeah, I am going to probably have to make the same decision you had to make very soon. 

Until then, I am going to try to spend as much time with her as possible.  And try to make her last days as pleasant as I can.

Thanks for understanding.

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20 minutes ago, brad1 said:

Wow, 19!

He looks very cool. I bet he was a great companion to you.

Yeah, I am going to probably have to make the same decision you had to make very soon. 

Until then, I am going to try to spend as much time with her as possible.  And try to make her last days as pleasant as I can.

Thanks for understanding.

I do, and also like you, the last six months of his life I was not working, so we spent every day together. And I am so appreciative of that time and knowing I was there when he needed me the most.

Sadly theres not much you can do to stop the hurt. All you can do is your best for them and enjoy the time you have. Which in a way is the same for everyone you know and love. I lost my father and one of my oldest and closest friends in 2018..  You dont really get over it to be honest. You just learn to live with it..

When the time comes the hurt will be bad..  BUT just know that as time goes on those same memories that at first upset you will become memories that you will cherish.

Oh and in looking at the pics I posted they are all quite moody..  This was his most favourite thing to do. Fighting. It took a while but I now look at these and smile.

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Edited by Rabs
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Aww. Shes beautiful... Its sad that our pets dont live as long as we do. But its just the way it is..  I know though how ever much it hurt, I woulndt change a thing..... The only reason I dont have a pet now is because I moved to a place where its just not practical to have a pet here.. I am looking at moving out one day in the next few years and maybe getting a dog or cat... 

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29 minutes ago, Rabs said:

Aww. Shes beautiful... Its sad that our pets dont live as long as we do. But its just the way it is..  I know though how ever much it hurt, I woulndt change a thing..... The only reason I dont have a pet now is because I moved to a place where its just not practical to have a pet here.. I am looking at moving out one day in the next few years and maybe getting a dog or cat... 

Thank you

15 minutes ago, SteveFord said:

Sorry to hear about your pet.

I had a beautiful Grey Persian and one sad day a car got him.  A car hit a bear cub and he must have gone to investigate and then a car got him.

Since then, no more cats as there's too much traffic around.

Thank you. My cat has lived her whole life inside.  That has got to be tough to see your pet like that. Sorry.

 

 

 

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I find it hard to deal with as like you folks spend your time with these creatures. 
 

They trust us to keep them safe and fed.  Give them affection when then come around.   It is harder to deal with when you have to comfort them when there time is near.   
 

As well , Sorry about your pet . 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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For the past couple of years, and epecially for the past few months, I have felt kind of like a nurse. I have to give her meds. at different times. I have given her a shot of B12 every month for the past 4 years. And for the past few months I have been giving her an IV of fluids that she needs. The shot is tough enough. But the IV has to be in her for a minute or so. And that can be a little hard to manage sometimes. Epecially by myself. She gets a 100 ml per dose. I have this IV bag I have to hang from the shower curtain in the bathroom. 

Never ever thought I would be doing stuff like this. I don't think I actually thought I COULD do stuff like this. Giving a shot? No way. Not me. I don't mind getting them, but I thought I would have a real problem giving one to someone else.  But you find out you are capable of doing things you never thought you were. 

 

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A year and a half ago,  we lost 2 of our 4 dogs a few days apart.  Cooper, the Lab, was old and it was expected.  But 5 days later with  Sasha, the German Shepherd it was not., and we were still struggling with losing Cooper,  She was healthy and only 9, but one day she wouldn't eat, the next day she couldn't control her bodily functions, blood in the urine, etc.  Next morning took her to the Vet expecting some type fix.  Nope.  She had to be put down that morning - cancer of the spleen, suffering.    I still get teary eyed driving down the road we took our walks on.    I read somewhere that - as much joy as you get from a pet - you can expect as much pain when you lose it.   But - the alternative is worse,  imho.    

Allow yourself a week or so to be miserably sad - but then  tell yourself you have to  accept it as a part of life.  Flowers bloom, the plant eventually dies.   Accept that and you'll be able to appreciate each day. 

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1 hour ago, fortyearspickn said:

A year and a half ago,  we lost 2 of our 4 dogs a few days apart.  Cooper, the Lab, was old and it was expected.  But 5 days later with  Sasha, the German Shepherd it was not., and we were still struggling with losing Cooper,  She was healthy and only 9, but one day she wouldn't eat, the next day she couldn't control her bodily functions, blood in the urine, etc.  Next morning took her to the Vet expecting some type fix.  Nope.  She had to be put down that morning - cancer of the spleen, suffering.    I still get teary eyed driving down the road we took our walks on.    I read somewhere that - as much joy as you get from a pet - you can expect as much pain when you lose it.   But - the alternative is worse,  imho.    

Allow yourself a week or so to be miserably sad - but then  tell yourself you have to  accept it as a part of life.  Flowers bloom, the plant eventually dies.   Accept that and you'll be able to appreciate each day. 

Thank you. Your words mean a lot. 

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We`ve always had cats and dogs and with them all being rescues, they all came with various hangups and attitudes.

It kills me everytime they leave but I console my self with that they had an absolutely great life here with us.

While I feel the loss I also refuse to dwell on it. Their photo is on our fridge and I make it my habit to remember the good times.

How others do it of course is up to them, my Mother has never got another dog as she said the pain was too much.

I`ve no advice to give you except they know that you are their person(especially cats, we`re employees') and they liked you.

 

 

 

(The above statement in no way diminishes the passive contribution that various goldfish has made to this household).  

 

Edited by Mutha
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Lost several pets over the years.  It can be rough.  Lost the last two withing a couple of years of each other.  Had them 15-13 years respectively.  They were Shih-Tzus.

That sort of thing was tough on one of my daughters who lost two  wonderful dogs to some kind of cancer after only having each one for a couple of years.

My ex and I used to breed silver Persian cats and have always had cats in the house.  Sadly, after we split up the whole cattery developed cystitis  and were gone within a few weeks.  All starting with just one cat.

Whitefang

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In October we had to put Clyde, our 13 year old Cocker Spaniel to sleep. My wife had him since he was a puppy, and I when I met my wife he was about 3. He stopped eating and what he did eat he would throw up. He became really skinny and we made the hard choice to ease his suffering. It was not an easy thing to do.

Edited by Sgt. Pepper
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3 hours ago, Mutha said:

Wait.............What?

My Sisters Son was walking at night across a Street in the Victorville, Ca area a couple nights ago & was hit by a Car. He died on the way to the Hospital. The people stopped, called 911 & Police. It is being called an Accident. We don’t know everything yet. Our family is in Shock & in grief. My Heart is broken for my dear Sister. She is the kindest person. 

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