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An elderly man in Florida had owned a large farm for several years.


He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees.


One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over.


He grabbed a five-gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.


As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.


As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond.


He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.


One of the women shouted to him, 'we're not coming out until you leave!'


The old man frowned, 'I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked.'


Holding the bucket up he said,

'I'm here to feed the alligator....'


Some old men can still think fast !!

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Okay..... Army Drill Instructor is talking to his recruits.... and says if they want to be in the Army, they need to have "commitment!"


D.I. says, "I'll demonstrate." and he brings out an alligator, and the alligator bits his penis.... the D.I. pokes the alligator in the eyes and

beats it over the head and tosses it aside.



Then he asks, "Who wants to demonstrate that he has "commitment"?


One recruit says, "I will....but don't poke me in the eyes!"






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