bored of my professional life

[awel]

not to take anything away from you but I am so sick of my job ...I have been doing the same thing for 41 years....many different company's but still machining and making square parts round and round stuff square....

I'm going to have a job interview with the school system to teach kids how to be a machinist this month....I want this so bad...I want to show kids what you can do when you learn this trade....I only have 7 more years at the most to work....then retirement.....

 

Teaching should be so nice, pass the knowledge to the new generation, how could you more participate than that to the society.

Hope you will get this job.

[awel]

Your body changes as you age so take a good look at your diet and find yourself another hobby that you really enjoy.

 

I believe you mentioned falconry some time back so perhaps there's some like minded people in your area you could get together with?

 

I have decided yesterday evening after all the message I received from people here, that today I will dring only 1 coffee in the morning and start drinking water the rest of the day, stop Light Coke, and energy drink and try to eat more healthy ... of course I will keep the option to share some beers with friends.

 

About falconry, I wish so much, but it is a closed world, not easy to enter in if you don't know someone in. :(

[awel]

Awel - try cutting in half (or more) your coffee intake. Just try it for 2 or 3 days as it needs that long to take effect.

I drank lots every day for over a decade and ended up with heart atrial fibrillation as well as the mood swings you are sort of describing.

 

And I cannot take one sip of Red Bull - ugh. That stuff is just poison.

 

These days I rediscover how plain clear water actually tastes really good!

 

Best wishes!

 

I know cafeine and energy drink are just poisons, so I have decided I will stop all this $h1t and eat better, let's see what happened :)

[Marshall Paul]

It's simple. Your not happy with your work. So change it.

And if your having trouble dealing with mood swings, get help. Now.

Stop walking in circles.

Hang in there mate.

[SteveFord]

So get a falcon and join the club. I'm sure that someone in your country breeds them and offers them for sale. Get some books, educate yourself and have at it.

 

Either that or take up motorcycles or reptiles or fishing or buy a "lifetime guitar" acoustic or something else to get you out of bed in the morning.

 

Having money is better than having no money and if your job sucks, well, that's why they call it work. Work is only so you can afford to do the things that you like.

 

My job is duller than dishwater but it's all in what you make of it. I have some laughs, do a good job and then I do the things that I enjoy.

 

 

 

[AndyK]

It seems you were in the same situation as myself. I know I can live with less money, I already had to do it few years back.

Hope you new situation will satisfy you better, keep me posted

 

Thanks

 

Thanks, Awel.

[splake]

Dude, remember your not alone. Lost, depressed, where you caught in the corporate nightmare. Unsure of which way to go. You can live on less, but how when you have one or more that count on you. that Boston Tune "Peace of Mind" rings out in bitter truth.

 

Sunday night stomache aches knowing that the impending doom that waits ahead. with confrontation, fighting, solving problems, getting micro-managed, insulted by middle manager who use the vertebre in your spine like rungs in a ladder. Set ups and fall guy roles you have played well, treated like a 16 year old kid when you have 20 years experience. You bury it ontop of knots in your stomache, try to rationalize it with cliche' "one day at a time", one hour at a time, Easy does it. You play mind games with yourself to try to stomache this existence but you feel you are in an oarless boat at high tide. You feel anxiety because you are getting older, time is running out, another day, another week, Christ has it been a year already? Like that Pink floyd Song, " you run and run to catch up with the sun but its sinking, The sun is the same in a relative way to your own life, shorter of breath and one day closer to death". Everywhere you look for God and he is gone. You try several things, writing, music, and senseless hobbies to pass the time. Life is passing, and moving fast. You are invisible to others, people look through you, not just at the corporate asylum, but everywhere, on the street, at the coffee shop, at the grocery store. Am I close?

 

I am there, I feel your pain, your lost desperation. Your problems probably are 90% your job, but be careful, after you have ignored your inner self for so long, he slowly dies and rots you from the inside out. Trust me, the poet inside of me is dying. i have ignored his plees for 20 years, and like a convict who can be suddenly free, I am unsure if I have any ambition, or any drive when I have been beat down in the bowels of the salt mine like a grand canyon mule hauling bricks up one at a time. Making mortar with blood, sweat and tears, building a house I dont want, in a town you dont want to live in. It is easy for those who can assimilate to give advice, they have found themselves, they have a compass a direction. Dude, I get it. and some are just better at turning it off, and tuning out that others. There is an old Zen saying I heard once, that If One has gone wrong in his life it is like being washed down stream, and the only way to make it right is to swim against the current , upstream to the point where things went wrong and take a differnt way. But 1000's of years ago, that author did not know what men with poetry in their hearts have to endure every day under the corporate blade.

 

I am not crying, wining or *****ing, You reached out and unfortunately that milky stuff that is my life, came out of a pandoras box. As a man you make your choices and you own it. So Own it, sleep in the bed that you made and others made for you with indiffernce or with ignorance. Like me, I try every way to find my way. Save more money, survive corporate back stabs made by shiny faced MBA grads who never left their mothers basements. Look for God. Does he come in the night like the tooth fairy? Is he the sandman? the easter bunny?

 

Desperation, Weight, depression, indiffernce from ones who are suppossed to love and care about you. Again, am I close? Do I relate? Mid life crisis, yeah I have been there, it doesnt get easier man when you lost your way, and your compass. If you know which way to go, try it if you can. And be cautionary of the advise of those who tell you to do this or do that? You are your own man, you fail on your own, and tragically like myself you set and fall into your own traps. Retirement, trust me dude, there will be nothng left, Have you ever seen a man who is unahppy and beaten down at his job, afer 25 years, 30 years. It is like putting on a helmet befor you get on a motocycle. Sometime you dont want to live after the crash, after the retirment party and you compromised your whole life. Like a sick puppy you will not be able to leave the papers. I have seen it, I have spoken to many of those men. Kahil Gibran one wrote- a man should live his life like a sea captain who is pulling his ship into a port and sees the remains of ships on the rocks" Avoid the rocks, learn from others mistakes, but the problem with that is, many of us, not all of us, are all caught in the system like a fly in a web one decision hangs you up on the rocks.

 

Purpose of this post is to let you know you are not alone, there are 10's of 1000's of us just like you. Many have it worse. the homeless, wounded vets, the mentally Ill. etc etc. Hang in there man, and knowing what a sham your corporate nightmare gig is , is half of the solution. Just think, many others there put on a smile and are corporate shills and cheerleaders, bleeding the corporate colors.Hiding in this cube farm. At least you still feel, still hurt and are still breathing under the wheel. they are robots. dead inside, hideous creatures motiveated by money. Inhuman. You are breathing for now. You know there is a problem with yourself, that is big. I am there also. I contiue to search day by day, And I am smart enought to see the jagged road that lies ahead. Regret, Frigging rasor sharp, terminal regret- It is coming. And coming fast. finding the way it the other part of the puzzle dude, but again, you are not alone out there brother. Hang in there. I now have to go to bed because I have to fight the demons tomorrow at 9. the demonic robots they are massing at the gates and here is sit. Alone, tired, with a lap top and too tired to play my Hummingbird. But I am alive dude, barely alive. I work for my wife, for my small house and a used toyota prius. Every waking moment, I search, I look in books, in music. An old guy once told me as he was teaching me to run a printing press when I was 15 years old. That some men never find their way, never know what they want to do. I never forgot that. I think it is imporant not to over think it, but do as I say, dont do as I do. Good luck man. Reach out PM if ya need to. I have my scars and I am not going down lightly. . The b***tards are going to have to bury me and then bury the shovel before I stop searching, looking, and try to find my way.

 

T.