“Fields of Stubble Straw”

[dhanners623]

Happy new year, everybody. Perfect time for a murder ballad….

Twenty years ago this month, there was a double murder outside of my hometown of 2,400 in rural East Central Illinois. The victims worked  at a hog farm — the Moriah Pork Palace — south of town. The killers were two of their co-workers, as well as the wife of one of the co-workers. They stole $400 and one of the victim’s pickups, but theft wasn’t their motive. Their motive: They wanted to pull off the “perfect” crime. These weren’t Illinois’ best and brightest. They fled to some kin in Oklahoma, and promptly told them they needed to repaint the pickup truck because they had killed a couple of people. First Rule of Committing the Perfect Crime: Don’t tell anyone  you committed a crime.

My late father knew one of the victims well and was pretty shaken up by the crime. One of the gunmen (serving a life sentence now) was the brother of one of my high school classmates, and I once worked with his father. The other assailant apparently died in prison in 2016. I need to research the genealogy but there’s a chance he and I are related. His ex-wife, who served as lookout during the shootings, served her time and last I heard, she was managing the McDonalds in my hometown. Being a small town, some people were grumbling about that.

I wrote a song about it some years back but was never crazy about it lyrically or melodically. I pulled it out a couple of days ago and started messing around with it again. Did a lot of cutting. Came up with a whole new melody. Rearranged some verses. Cut some lines and wrote new ones. Gave it a new title. Stuck to three chords and the truth.

Grabbed the J-35 and here’s where it stands: 

 

 

Edited January 11 by dhanners623

[Buc McMaster]

Good work, Mr. H.  A few observations.............

Making a nod to my thread about the defining influence of the pick hand, many of your songs feature the same chugging, choking strumming heard here.  Not a bad thing at all, just a very prominent characteristic of your style of play.  It's a good technique, however repetitive it may be.

Having listened to many of your originals it is so very obvious you have a journalistic background.  Your lyrics are chock full of the vivid description and great detail found in news reporting.......as Jack Webb said, just the facts, ma'am.  This is not a bad thing either, merely a recognizable trait of your writing, which in general I happen to enjoy.  The only caveat I would add is there is much to be said for lyrical subtlety and innuendo that serves to draw listeners in.  There is no subtlety in your writing, another hallmark of the reporter in you.

Keep doin' what yer doin', sir!

[Murph]

Bravo David. Mighty fine.

[dhanners623]

Thanks, guys. I appreciate it.

Re: technique.  I guess I do what I feel works for me; never gave much thought to whether it was “repetitive.” I do rely a lot on palm muting, hammer-ones and pull-offs and whatnot. I think when I play a normal gig there is enough variety and use of dynamics that “repetitiveness” is never a complaint I’ve gotten from audiences or bookers. I strum some songs, I play fingerstyle on some songs.

As far as writing style, yeah, I worked as a newspaper reporter for 37 years so the songs have a strong storytelling bent. Details are important because they make the stories more accurate/real. I have sat through too damn many open mics where somebody gets up and sings some obtuse lyrics that only make sense to them and their cat. Their metaphors are nonsensical and don’t register quickly in the brain — and they don’t seem that interested in improving them. And they write yet another song about love/broken hearts/romantic despair, etc. Yeah, I know love makes the world go ‘round, but jeez, come up with a new and different way to tell us about it.

Frankly, that’s why I’d rather write songs about interesting/ different people, events, places, times, etc. And a certain number of those people are going to be psychos of one sort or another. I think my songs have subtlety when it is called for. Some of these narratives would leave the listener confused if I relied on innuendo. I want the listener to know exactly what is going on. I’m not a poet. I’m not a Bob Dylan or a Townes Van Zandt, and I would sound silly trying to be.

I’m reminded of a Leo Kottke quote from years back about how listeners will forgive a wrong note but they won’t forgive an insincere note. If I try to be overly poetic, it would probably sound insincere. That said, I think at least my last verse is descriptively poetic….

I also have always agreed with one of Rick Rubin’s quotes about creativity: “In terms of priority, inspiration comes first. You come next. The audience comes last.”

Edited January 11 by dhanners623

[Buc McMaster]

For the most part, I agree with what you say, David.........when it comes to creativity the audience indeed comes last.......myself included.

[Murph]

I wonder, with your deep knowledge and history of Southern Illinois, have you ever written about the Shelton Brothers Gang and Charles Birger?

[dhanners623]

4 hours ago, Murph said:

I wonder, with your deep knowledge and history of Southern Illinois, have you ever written about the Shelton Brothers Gang and Charles Birger?

The short answer is no, I haven’t. The longer answer is I really should. Haven’t thought of them for years but yeah, they’d make a great song. Has anyone written one that you know of? (And you’d be perfect for it, too.)

I should look to see if there are any good books on the Shelton Brothers Gang….

UPDATE: Found the book “Bloody Williamson: A Chapter in American Lawlessness” at an online bookstore here in the UK and ordered it. We’ll see what songs spring from it….

Edited January 12 by dhanners623

[Murph]

1 hour ago, dhanners623 said:

The short answer is no, I haven’t. The longer answer is I really should. Haven’t thought of them for years but yeah, they’d make a great song. Has anyone written one that you know of? (And you’d be perfect for it, too.)

I haven't yet, but might someday.

It's an interesting story.

[Lars68]

David, I really like this. Can you post the lyrics? I always find it easier to ”get” a song if I can read along.

As far as writing and playing styles, having a personal style is a strength, as long as the listener is not put off by repetitiveness among songs. For your songs, David, the story is what draws me in, and I haven't really given much thought to similarities in playing style. I can appreciate both a poetic style, as well as storytelling one. However, any song with lyrics that are lost on me has a massive disadvantage in my book. What is the point of writing lyrics if no one can understand what you are trying to say? That doesn't mean everything has to be spelled out, but I need to be in the right ballpark, playing the appropriate sport at least as a listener. 

Lars

[Dave F]

Your follow-up song can be 'Stubble Straw Fields Forever'

[dhanners623]

11 hours ago, Lars68 said:

David, I really like this. Can you post the lyrics? I always find it easier to ”get” a song if I can read along.

As far as writing and playing styles, having a personal style is a strength, as long as the listener is not put off by repetitiveness among songs. For your songs, David, the story is what draws me in, and I haven't really given much thought to similarities in playing style. I can appreciate both a poetic style, as well as storytelling one. However, any song with lyrics that are lost on me has a massive disadvantage in my book. What is the point of writing lyrics if no one can understand what you are trying to say? That doesn't mean everything has to be spelled out, but I need to be in the right ballpark, playing the appropriate sport at least as a listener. 

Lars

Thanks. Here are the lyrics:

Fields of Stubble Straw

© 2024 by David Hanners         

 

Jerry Darling and Wesley Hall

Were good and honest men

Worked a hog farm east of Route 49

That’s where they met their end

 

Two half-wits they worked with and one of their teen brides

Shot Hall and Darling dead

Stole 400 bucks and Darling’s truck

And away they fled

 

Bonnie and the two Clydes sped south

On their flight from the law

Run out of luck trying to repaint that truck

Next day down in Oklahoma

 

They told the cops their only aim

Was committing the perfect crime

Like Stupid met Evil and had a child

On that hog farm east of Route 49

 

Prairie wind cuts so cold

In winter, it chaffs you raw

Leaves you low and dying

In a field of stubble straw

Edited January 13 by dhanners623

[dhanners623]

I’m also toying with a version where I take the victims’ names out and also remove the female. Names — especially of real people — can sometimes be a hindrance, and I was worrying that the woman was one character too many. If you overload a song with thoughts, you’re on shaky ground.

And now that I think of it, “Dime-Store Dillingers” would be a good band name….

Fields of Stubble Straw

© 2024 by David Hanners         

 

There were two guys in my hometown

Good and honest men

Worked a hog farm east of Route 49

That’s where they met their end

 

Two half-wits they worked with

Shot those men dead

Stole 400 bucks and a pickup truck

And away they fled

 

The dime-store Dillingers sped south

On their flight from the law

Run out of luck trying to repaint that truck

Next day down in Oklahoma

 

Told the cops their plan

Was to commit the perfect crime

Like Stupid met Evil and had a child

On that hog farm east of Route 49

 

Prairie wind cuts so cold

In winter, it chaffs you raw

Leaves you low and dying

In a field of stubble straw

Edited January 13 by dhanners623

[Buc McMaster]

I like the second lyric.  You are right about the names.........unless one has prior knowledge of the story, such specifics can elicit a 'who?' response from listeners.  Simplicity and some lyrical vagueness are appealing.

[Murph]

I don't know.

Sam Stone, Curtis Loew, Pancho and Lefty.

A boy named Sue.

Sometimes the name makes the song.

 

[Lars68]

6 hours ago, Murph said:

I don't know.

Sam Stone, Curtis Loew, Pancho and Lefty.

A boy named Sue.

Sometimes the name makes the song.

 

I agree with Murph. Using names make the story more personal, and I think this holds true whether a story is fictional or not.

Another example to add to the ones in Murph's list is Joe Roberts in Springsteen's Highway Patrolman. Lots of made up names in songs…

Lars

Edited January 13 by Lars68

[dhanners623]

I go back and forth on the names, frankly. The pros of using them is it tells you who the song is about. It puts names on the victims and gives some personality/humanity beyond “two guys.” It adds a sense of realism.

There are cons, too. From purely a songwriting standpoint, being specific with the names adds more information for the listener to process, so you have to weigh whether that information is worth it. As with writing a news story, you have to make an editorial judgment about the information’s relevance.

Another consideration — and this comes from having grown up in that small town — is that the victims’ families are still alive, as are two of the three defendants and the families of all three defendants. Even if I change the names, people in that town will know who/what the song is about. When I was reporting stories dealing with violent deaths, I always tried hard to be sensitive to the feelings of families. It’s just the human thing to do.

The matter of the female lookout who was married to one of the killers is a bit easier. She doesn’t add much to the song. She’s paid her debt to society and, from all appearances, appears to be trying to rebuild her life and be a productive member of society. Again, it’s a small town and there are plenty of people there who will never forget or forgive her.

My inclination at this point is to keep the victims’ names but ditch the woman.

[PrairieDog]

3 hours ago, dhanners623 said:

I go back and forth on the names, frankly. The pros of using them is it tells you who the song is about. It puts names on the victims and gives some personality

The matter of the female lookout who was married to one of the killers is a bit easier. She doesn’t add much to the song. She’s paid her debt to society and, from all appearances, appears to be trying to rebuild her life and be a productive member of society. Again, it’s a small town and there are plenty of people there who will never forget or forgive her.

My inclination at this point is to keep the victims’ names but ditch the woman.

Yeah, so recent, it’s a kindness to let her past be.  But I like the names at the start.  I was wondering really why the kids took those two out in particular? I mean, couldn’t they have killed anyone in the “perfect” crime.  Did they not like the dudes, somebody move on somebody’s  girl, gave the kids a bad look one day, did they have money?  Seems like there might be a bit more to the story than just their claim to commit  perfect murder.  Of course, they were dumbasses to start with, so maybe I’m over thinking it.  

[dhanners623]

52 minutes ago, PrairieDog said:

Yeah, so recent, it’s a kindness to let her past be.  But I like the names at the start.  I was wondering really why the kids took those two out in particular? I mean, couldn’t they have killed anyone in the “perfect” crime.  Did they not like the dudes, somebody move on somebody’s  girl, gave the kids a bad look one day, did they have money?  Seems like there might be a bit more to the story than just their claim to commit  perfect murder.  Of course, they were dumbasses to start with, so maybe I’m over thinking it.  

Everything I’ve read or heard locally says as hard as it is to believe, they just thought they could pull off the perfect crime. (Don’t expect rational thinking from irrational people….) From all indications, the killers were actually friends with the victims and there was no bad blood. It was payday, and Hall had cashed his paycheck and so they took $400 he had, and they took Darling’s pickup. The sheriff’s department said the “perfect crime” thing was hard to comprehend, but that’s the only explanation the defendants ever gave. They couldn’t pull off a perfect shoplifting of a pack of gum from the town’s lone convenience store.

Being a modern hog operation, you had to shower before entering the facility and upon exiting. They shot one of the victims as he was showering. They dumped both the bodies in a retention pond, which is about as despicable as you can get.

Here are revised lyrics. They used a .22 rifle; I made up the Ruger part. I’ve emailed the sheriff’s office to see if they remember the make and model.

Fields of Stubble Straw

© 2024 by David Hanners         

 

Jerry Darling and Wesley Hall

Were good and honest men

Worked a hog farm east of Route 49

That’s where they met their end

 

Two half-wits they worked with had a Ruger .22

Shot Hall and Darling dead

Stole 400 bucks and Darling’s truck

And away they fled

 

The dime-store Dillingers sped south

On their flight from the law

Run out of luck trying to repaint that truck

Next day down in Oklahoma

 

Told the cops their only aim

Was to commit the perfect crime

Like Stupid met Evil and had a child

On that hog farm east of Route 49

 

Prairie wind cuts so cold

In winter, it chaffs you raw

Leaves you low and dying

In a field of stubble straw

[PrairieDog]

So, I like this revision.  Just wondering, what about bookending the song with your last verse?  it’s a great evocative image.  I’d maybe add that as an intro to suck the audience in, “hey, what’s that now?” then give it a poignant reprise at the end.

Edited January 14 by PrairieDog

[dhanners623]

9 hours ago, PrairieDog said:

So, I like this revision.  Just wondering, what about bookending the song with your last verse?  it’s a great evocative image.  I’d maybe add that as an intro to suck the audience in, “hey, what’s that now?” then give it a poignant reprise at the end.

That’s a possibility. The crime happened in January, which is always pretty dismal in that part of Illinois. In fact, in an earlier version of the song, the first verse was “In my hometown of Casey, Illinois/‘Neath a January sky so gray/They talk of a crime so bad/It chills me to this day.” Then it went into the “Jerry Darling and Wesley Hall….” verse.

While the “In my hometown…” verse served the folk-song purpose of foreshadowing, I cut it out of a concern for length. Maybe it should go back in. Being a folkie, I get self-conscious about length because I’ve heard too many folksingers (and others) drone on for seven or eight verses when a tightly written five would’ve told the story just as well.

I’m on the bill of a showcase at a tavern in downtown Manchester today; I was going to do the song and maybe I’ll throw the old first verse back on. Also on the bill is an Americana act from Liverpool, of all places. It’ll blow their minds….

[Murph]

1 hour ago, dhanners623 said:

 The crime happened in January, which is always pretty dismal in that part of Illinois. 

Indeed. 

It's 10 F right now, and I'm down on the river....

[PrairieDog]

3 hours ago, dhanners623 said:

That’s a possibility. The crime happened in January, which is always pretty dismal in that part of Illinois. In fact, in an earlier version of the song, the first verse was “In my hometown of Casey, Illinois/‘Neath a January sky so gray/They talk of a crime so bad/It chills me to this day.” Then it went into the “Jerry Darling and Wesley Hall….” verse.

I’m on the bill of a showcase at a tavern in downtown Manchester today; I was going to do the song and maybe I’ll throw the old first verse back on. Also on the bill is an Americana act from Liverpool, of all places. It’ll blow their minds….

Sure, that would serve the same purpose to sort of ease your listeners into what they are about to hear….

Just mentioning “they talk” is a bit passive, it removes your audience from the story a step, (implies they are listening to second hand news)… you want them in there with you.  How ‘bout just, “a crime so grim, it still chills me to this day.” I’m a writer and a long time editor (I know, you wouldn’t know from my posts, chuckle, busman’s holiday).  And I realize I’m just blathering uninvited here, I have no ego invested, so take what helps, brush off the rest… Knock ‘em dead  at the show! 

Edited January 14 by PrairieDog

[dhanners623]

5 hours ago, PrairieDog said:

Sure, that would serve the same purpose to sort of ease your listeners into what they are about to hear….

Just mentioning “they talk” is a bit passive, it removes your audience from the story a step, (implies they are listening to second hand news)… you want them in there with you.  How ‘bout just, “a crime so grim, it still chills me to this day.” I’m a writer and a long time editor (I know, you wouldn’t know from my posts, chuckle, busman’s holiday).  And I realize I’m just blathering uninvited here, I have no ego invested, so take what helps, brush off the rest… Knock ‘em dead  at the show! 

I can see what you’re saying re: “They talk…” — up to a point. My aim in using it was to give a nod to the folk tradition of foretelling in the first verse. Plus, it understands the listener is not in the song’s locale, but explains that if he/she were, the murders are  what some people might be talking about. It puts them on the same page as the townsfolk.

That said, while waiting for my set this afternoon (more on that in a moment) I was thinking about your comment re: Was committing the perfect crime really the motive? It made me think that while that is an important aspect of the case, the song just gives it one line. Plus, the third and fourth lines of that verse — “Like Stupid met Evil and had a child/On that hog farm east of Route 49” — have always bothered me. The third line particularly sounds like just an attempt to be cute, and not a very good one at that.

So when I got home, I experimented with replacing those two lines with, “They weren’t drunk or high, it was just the way they are/And somebody had to die.”  I’m going to work on it some more to try and develop an internal rhyme in the third line, but I like the concept.

Anyway, I did the song at the show and it went over really well. I did the version with the “In my hometown….” first verse and the song didn’t seem too long because of it. Plus, that verse eases you into the next verse, whose first line introduces the victims. This way, the listener isn’t confronted with two names of people they don’t know right off the bat. With the “hometown” verse before it, you’re given a sense they’re characters in the crime story.

It’s getting there….

 

 

[dhanners623]

I think I figured out the verse:

Told the cops they schemed

to commit the perfect crime

Can’t blame booze or meth for those awful deaths

On that hog farm east of Route 49

 

[MissouriPicker]

God, good job, David!  You and Ben are killin’ me with these songs about “real” people.  It’s great to dig-out an old song you wern’t quite satisfied with and turn it into a winner.  Keep’ em coming!  You guys are inspiring me.