Sheepdog1969 Posted July 20 Share Posted July 20 Guess what Mr. Valli, (and the 4 seasons), I'm defiantly a "Big Boy", but over the last couple of days, I found myself tearing up a bit. (and if you tell anybody I'll kick your a$$). I happen to be experiencing a number of new things that each, in and of themselves, tug at my heart strings in ways I am quite uncomfortable with. 1. My incredible, highly intelligent, and inexplicably "old souled" 18 year old daughter is soon to "leave the nest". On August 8th, 2024, the best thing that ever happened to me, will begin her colligate experience as a Freshman at The University of Alabama, pursuing her dream of becoming an Aerospace Engineer. My excitement for her is equally matched by the emotional pain associated with letting her go. Lord, it already hurts so much! I literally have spent the last 5 days building a "go bag" for her, (actually a rolling Pelican Case), that emotionally encapsulates the 18 years of protection I have provided her until now. You bet your bippy that this "go bag" contains 30 days of survival for her, in the event that the SHTF. (I have done the math, and the 12 hour drive it takes me to get to her by car at The U of A today, may take me 33 days in a worst case scenario.) I told her that she'll either take the Pelican Case to school, or I'll assume the role of a homeless vagrant, (living in a van down by the river), near her dorm, so I can provide her with discrete security/protection for the next 4+ years. The choice is hers. (If you think I'm kidding, you don't know me!) 2. I just learned that a forum friend of mine, JDGM, may not be long for this earth. I so hoped that this would not come to pass. (how freaking selfish am I? He is suffering the incalculable pain of Cancer, and I am just loosing a sharp witted friend! Yup, I'm a D-bag!) Yet, I still hurt for him, his family, and for Mesho, (his niece), who has become his liaison for us here. 3. I have come to the realization that, save for my 82 year old father, (whom I drive one hour, each way, at least one a week to help in anyway that he needs, since the passing of my mother/his wife.), I am going to be all alone. Hopefully, my daughter will be taking advantage of internships over the next 4 summers. Sadly for me, they exist far closer to Tuscaloosa than Harvard, Il.. I'm going to have to get used to accepting that what is best for her, will be a kick in the sack for me. I'm telling you that this "sweating from the eyes" thing, and the pain in the gut that comes with it, SUCKS!!! I am so used to being able to confront/defeat something that is tangible, which causes me, (or my kin) harm/pain. Someone please explain to me how I can rip the throat out of "Loss"? How can I stab it, punch it, or choke it out? My typical, go to, Neanderthal reactionary devices are apparently useless in this situation. Please don't tell me that I will have to "grow" emotionally. (I only have the emotional capacity, and maturity, of a 12 year old, btw) ,,,and if any of yous freaking idiots call me Francis, I'll freaking kill ya!!... (...to which Sargant Hulka would reply, "Lighten up Francis!") I suppose that, "This is just the way of things." To which I reply, "I STILL DON'T LIKE IT!!!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
'Scales Posted July 20 Share Posted July 20 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sgt. Pepper Posted July 20 Share Posted July 20 (edited) No matter what we do or what happens to us life continues to go on. Are you gonna have to be a Roll Tide fan? I unfortunately like Cal, who are awful. Used to be decent in B Ball. Edited July 20 by Sgt. Pepper 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheepdog1969 Posted July 20 Author Share Posted July 20 5 minutes ago, Sgt. Pepper said: Are you gonna have to be a Roll Tide fan? Damn straight!!! I am the "Capstone" baby. (It's a Bama thing.) ROLL TIDE!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheepdog1969 Posted July 20 Author Share Posted July 20 17 minutes ago, 'Scales said: Thanks brother, for the wonderfully beautiful song. It was spot on! It made my eyes quite "sweaty". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sgt. Pepper Posted July 20 Share Posted July 20 7 minutes ago, Sheepdog1969 said: Damn straight!!! I am the "Capstone" baby. (It's a Bama thing.) ROLL TIDE!!! They haven’t rolled for a few years now. Seems like they used to win every year or other year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheepdog1969 Posted July 20 Author Share Posted July 20 4 minutes ago, Sgt. Pepper said: They haven’t rolled for a few years now. Seems like they used to win every year or other year. That's because my kid wasn't there yet. Put your money on Crimson, it's a sure bet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sgt. Pepper Posted July 20 Share Posted July 20 (edited) 28 minutes ago, Sheepdog1969 said: That's because my kid wasn't there yet. Put your money on Crimson, it's a sure bet. Nah, I don’t think an Aerospace Engineering student (no matter how intelligent she is) is going to have any affect on touchdowns scored. Is she going to lace up her cleats? Edited July 20 by Sgt. Pepper Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheepdog1969 Posted July 20 Author Share Posted July 20 15 minutes ago, Sgt. Pepper said: Nah, I don’t think an Aerospace Engineering student (no matter how intelligent she is) is going to have any affect on touchdowns scored. The word is, "Motivation". She's a smooth operator and pretty cute to boot. I have "learned her" to control the boys. Watch and see. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrairieDog Posted July 20 Share Posted July 20 (edited) I hear you, Sheep. These transitions are all tough. Except for my wife, like the Gillian Welch song says, “the ties of kinship, I have not known them” but because of that, I’m always especially sensitive to the heartaches/breaks and losses in happy families I see around me. Even if I didn’t get to benefit directly from a nurturing home, it honestly thrills me and warms my heart when I hear folks praising and rejoicing in their families/wives/kids. Happy families make happy people, and happy people make the world a better place for us all, with anything they do. And kudos to you for raising a bright, confident, ambitious kid. You done good, dad! Edited July 20 by PrairieDog 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheepdog1969 Posted July 20 Author Share Posted July 20 29 minutes ago, PrairieDog said: I hear you, Sheep. These transitions are all tough. Except for my wife, like the Gillian Welch song says, “the ties of kinship, I have not known them” but because of that, I’m always especially sensitive to the heartaches/breaks and losses in happy families I see around me. Even if I didn’t get to benefit directly from a nurturing home, it honestly thrills me and warms my heart when I hear folks praising and rejoicing in their families/wives/kids. Happy families make happy people, and happy people make the world a better place for us all, with anything they do. And kudos to you for raising a bright, confident, ambitious kid. You done good, dad! you got words bro! (Hard to type because the "eye sweat" is blinding me!!!)! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparquelito Posted July 21 Share Posted July 21 You and Lexi have been in my thoughts and prayers for many weeks now, old friend. 🙂 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissouriPicker Posted July 21 Share Posted July 21 Big boys DO cry! It’s very difficult letting go…..We just need to keep moving forward. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ceptorman Posted July 21 Share Posted July 21 I have an "out of the box" idea, it may seem odd at first, but after you think about it, it is actually a very good idea, and will pay off for both of you. Have your daughter go to Purdue University! It's probably just a few hours from home, one of the best Aeronautical Engineering schools in the world, NASA has classes there, so does the US Air Force. She would look so much better in black/gold than red anyway 😁 I know exactly what you're going through, my oldest daughter moved 1200 miles from home 8 years ago for college. It tore me up, but I still had another daughter at home. Now myself, the wife, and daughter number two moved to her state as well. Daughter 1 is married with two boys that I see a few times a week, I can't imagine being 1200 miles away from them. Daughter 2 is in nursing school but living at home. I have offered to be her daily driver, bodyguard, and mechanic for the rest of her life, she laughs but I would do that. She will move someday but I'm pretty sure she won't move away. Just remember what a good kid she is, and how well you have prepared her for life, and be proud of her. Part of life and parenthood is knowing when to let them go 🙂 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fortyearspickn Posted July 21 Share Posted July 21 I read something once, - searching for peace at a time a few years back when I was a few quarts low - that stuck with me as a philosophy, or teaching, that helped a great deal. Holding religious beliefs aside, as much as one can, it was simply this: The pain you feel in life is actually the departure of the joy you have already enjoyed. The accumulation of happiness from children, for example, leaves slowly when they do. The decades of joy and love with a spouse - is purged suddenly if they die unexpectedly. Every happy memory, from a birthday or family Christmas, is a part of our being - and will eventually be gone. Balancing the books, philosophically. So, yes, happy people make happy families, and happy families make happy people. And a better world. But, as a plant must eventually see it's flowers die - we must too. And the plant 'knows', soon it will die too. This is why we are innately resistant to change. I was significantly sadder when we dropped our last child off at college, than the 3 before him. Not, certainly, because I loved him more, but selfishly, because I knew he was the last flower. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sgt. Pepper Posted July 21 Share Posted July 21 (edited) 15 hours ago, MissouriPicker said: Big boys DO cry! It’s very difficult letting go…..We just need to keep moving forward. The Cure wrote a song called Boys Don’t Cry. I don’t believe it is mentioned in the song how big or small these boys are. I thought it was big girls don’t cry. Yep, it is. Edited July 21 by Sgt. Pepper 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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