merciful-evans Posted June 17 Share Posted June 17 A hippie went for a swim in the sea, got into difficulties and drowned. The lifeguard explained. "I just couldn't reach him, he was too far out" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fortyearspickn Posted June 20 Share Posted June 20 A burglar broke into a house one night. He shone his flashlight around, looking for valuables, and when he picked up a CD player to place in his sack, a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark saying "Jesus is watching you." The thief nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off and froze. When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head, clicked the light back on and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shone his light around frantically looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot. "Yep," the parrot confessed, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who the heck are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses??!!" the burglar laughed. "What kind of stupid people would name a parrot Moses?" "Probably the same kind of people that would name a rottweiler Jesus," the bird answered Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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