If you could ask the Devil for anything what would it be?

[KSG_Standard]

woot...

[tuckomf]

As long as there was no soul selling involved, and he was just like "Behold, I am the dark lord of the abyss....and i'm feeling rather jolly and generous tonight. What gift dost thou yearn for!?" I'd probably ask for a catamaran or something cool like that. Maybe a Triumph Bonneville. Or a crazy voyage on the catamaran that ends in me finding treasure - part of which is a Triumph Bonneville.

[FirstMeasure]

As long as there was no soul selling involved' date=' and he was just like "Behold, I am the dark lord of the abyss....and i'm feeling rather jolly and generous tonight. What gift dost thou yearn for!?" I'd probably ask for a catamaran or something cool like that. Maybe a Triumph Bonneville. Or a crazy voyage on the catamaran that ends in me finding treasure - part of which is a Triumph Bonneville.[/quote']

Your thinking of Santa, not Satan.

[G u e s t]

I would ask this hypothetical Devil/Santa/Satan to try and encourage folks to realise the strangeness of saying "I will not read a biased book on evolution to have some scientist tell me there's no God" whilst basing their belief system on some scribblings put down by misogynistic, patriarchal arabs a few thousand years ago.

 

This enables them to say "I do not believe in evolution" despite the empirical evidence, yet believe in the whole Bible thing based on no evidence whatsoever - just word of mouth and hearsay.

 

It also enables them to suggest that Monty Python's "Life of Brian" was a mockery of Christ, because they cannot accept that it was actually a mockery of people like themselves..... 'it's a sandal'.

 

Nah - scrub that. I'd ask him to make it so as we could all, ALL, just get along.

[daveinspain]

You all should have listened to me.... :-

[FirstMeasure]

Don't vote or respond to this poll.... If you do your his!!!

you mean I've been tricked by Beelzebubba

[The Holy Hand Grenade]

I would ask this hypothetical Devil/Santa/Satan to try and encourage folks to realise the strangeness of saying "I will not read a biased book on evolution to have some scientist tell me there's no God" whilst basing their belief system on some scribblings put down by misogynistic' date=' patriarchal arabs a few thousand years ago.

 

This enables them to say "[i']I do not believe in evolution[/i]" despite the empirical evidence, yet believe in the whole Bible thing based on no evidence whatsoever - just word of mouth and hearsay.

 

It also enables them to suggest that Monty Python's "Life of Brian" was a mockery of Christ, because they cannot accept that it was actually a mockery of people like themselves..... 'it's a sandal'.

 

Nah - scrub that. I'd ask him to make it so as we could all, ALL, just get along.

 

Guest your post is full of ownage.

[Homz]

Religious threads are so entertaining. I'm not sure if they're comedies or tragedies.

[The Holy Hand Grenade]

Religious threads are so entertaining. I'm not sure if they're comedies or tragedies.

 

What i am trying to understand a post below this one is bashing Liberal Americans but as soon as i say something about Christianity all hell breaks loose.

[Homz]

I gave up on trying to understand the minds of people who think worshiping cloud gods is a rational behavior.

 

These kind of people would suppress science if they had the power.

[The Holy Hand Grenade]

I gave up on trying to understand the minds of people who think worshiping cloud gods is a rational behavior.

 

These kind of people would suppress science if they had the power.

 

I think it has allot to do with a misplace sense of reality, They seem to believe whatever comforts them is true.

 

They also have this huge Persecution complex.

[FirstMeasure]

I gave up on trying to understand the minds of people who think worshiping cloud gods is a rational behavior.

 

These kind of people would suppress science if they had the power.

Oh come on, you're just sour grapes 'cause missed out on the first page. You'll still bandy words with a bible Thumper, won't ya?

[djroge1]

Although I thought of just letting this thread die I thought well why not make a correction to this comment.

 

 

... yet believe in the whole Bible thing based on no evidence whatsoever - just word of mouth and hearsay.

 

It also enables them to suggest that Monty Python's "Life of Brian" was a mockery of Christ' date=' because they cannot accept that it was actually a mockery of people like themselves..... 'it's a sandal'.

 

[b']Nah - scrub that. I'd ask him to make it so as we could all, ALL, just get along.[/b]

 

You seem to have forgotten or never learned or choose to ignore the fact that archaeology is and has always been a friend of the Bible. The more they dig, the more proof is found of actual events recorded in the Bible. So to say that there is no proof is totally wrong.

 

On a second note, "Life of Brian" was not my favorite MP movie but it was funny all the same. I've actually thought about watching part of it for a class I've written about different denominations. The class covers how did all the different Christian denominations come about.

 

I agree - we need to get along.

[daveinspain]

you mean I've been tricked by Beelzebubba

 

 

Unfortunately... I am afraid so.... But Jesus is a friend of mine, so I will have a word with him.... I wrote a song about it once that was actually pretty popular on YouTube

[G u e s t]

I have not forgotten, and I have learned and I do NOT ignore the facts the archaeologists have found - which are empirical proofs regarding many of the events mentioned in the Bible. Fact is I actually sent nearly 12 months in those very sites on the east bank of the River Jordan. I stood on Mount Nebo and looked out over the promised land, and saw Jericho and Jerusalem, as did Moses in his time. I climbed the stoney paths of Gadara and sat in the ruins of Umm Qais, from whence Paul wrote to the Corinthians - and listened to the archaelogists debate whether it was indeed there or elswhere in the holy lands. I stood in Bethlehem in three feet of snow that winter. I walked on the shores of the Sea of Galilee (though called Lake Tiberias by the local Druze) where so many of the significant things in the Life of Jeus took place. I even clambered up the mount from which his sermon was given until the Syrian militia drove up and ejected us at gunpoint (this was back in the eighties - things were..... tense back then). And I have seen the Dead-Sea Scrolls and the places they were found.

 

And the God stuff is hearsay and word of mouth. Yes, the people and places are all good, but because we have proof Hitler stood on the steps at Nurenburg, it does not follow that he said 'Ich Bein Ein Nurenburger, Ich liebe die jüdischen Leute'. Because he didn't.

 

You see I lived and worked in Jordan for a year - and spent a lot of my spare time with the archaelogists and the local christians and moslems (and it was a blast, I have to say.....).

 

And all I could see was a really well-meaning guy (Jesus) following in the footsteps of Buddha and Zoroaster and followed in turn by Muhammad, preaching peace and love and the avoidance of idolatry.

 

Sadly, the idolatry, and the bigoted, fundamentalist, hate fuelled killing in their names goes against everything they ever taught. And the Bible is at best wonderful parable and allegory, at worst a misogynistic paternalistic supression handbook - no more, no less.

[DamienAzrael]

I dunno...he's given me some nice stuff already.

[wicked1]

And all I could see was a really well-meaning guy (Jesus) following in the footsteps of Buddha and Zoroaster and followed in turn by Muhammad' date=' preaching peace and love and the avoidance of idolatry.

 

[/quote']

 

And Mithra. You forgot Mithra. Born in a cave around the time of the winter solstice to a virgin...

 

You seem to have forgotten or never learned or choose to ignore the fact that archaeology is and has always been a friend of the Bible. The more they dig' date=' the more proof is found of actual events recorded in the Bible. So to say that there is no proof is totally wrong.

[/quote']

 

Just because you can see evidence that a city was destroyed by fire does not mean the story of raining fire & brimstone because god wanted to destroy it is a true story. MUCH more likely it was a volcano. Evidence of a flood? Wow--floods never happen, do they? In fact, that is so unheard of, someone would probably be scared and try to build a boat to save his family. He might even take food along.

 

I could dig up an arrowhead in my backyard and make up a story about how Zeus decided to destroy Indiana by raining spears down on the land, but that doesn't make my explanation true.

[Rockin365]

I allready sold my soul,

 

but im dislexic,

 

so i sold it to santa.

[DamienAzrael]

 

Just because you can see evidence that a city was destroyed by fire does not mean the story of raining fire & brimstone because god wanted to destroy it is a true story. MUCH more likely it was a volcano. Evidence of a flood? Wow--floods never happen' date=' do they? In fact, that is so unheard of, someone would probably be scared and try to build a boat to save his family. He might even take food along.

 

I could dig up an arrowhead in my backyard and make up a story about how Zeus decided to destroy Indiana by raining spears down on the land, but that doesn't make my explanation true.

 

 

 

[/quote']

=D>

[AXE®]

And ungay bass0le ...

[Steven Tari]

My old job back, as elevator operator in Purgatory. This world sucks. Yelling "GOING DOWN"was fun, thats all you ever yelled because there was no up button. David Lee Roth tried out for the job. But no one took him serious because of the tights.

[Basshole]

And ungay bass0le ...

 

I play football,

 

We slap each others butts, tackle each other while whereing tight spandex, and like to take showeres with each other naked.

 

It's part of the job description.

[albertjohn]

Just in case you haven't heard this one before.......

 

FRIDAYS IN HELL

 

One day a guy died and found himself in hell. As he was wallowing in

despair, he had his first meeting with a demon.

 

The demon asked, "Why so glum?"

 

The guy responded, "What do you think? I'm in hell!"

 

"Hell's not so bad," the demon said. "We actually have a lot of fun

down here. You a drinking man?"

 

"Sure," the man said, "I love to drink."

 

"Well, you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays all we do is drink.

Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet Tab and Fresca. We

drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!"

 

The guy is astounded. "Damn, that sounds great."

 

"You a smoker?" the demon asked.

 

"You better believe it!"

 

"You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over

the world and smoke our lungs out! . If you get cancer, no biggie.

You're already dead, remember?"

 

"Wow, the guy said, "that's awesome!"

 

The demon continued. "I bet you like to gamble."

 

"Why yes, as a matter of fact I do."

 

"Wednesdays you can gamble all you want. Craps, blackjack,

roulette, poker, slots, whatever. If you go bankrupt, well, you're

dead anyhow.

You into drugs?"

 

The guy said, "Are you kidding? I love drugs! You don't mean . . .."

 

"That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big

bowl of crack, or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You

can do all the drugs you want, you're dead, who cares!"

 

"Wow," the guy said, starting to feel better about his situation,

"I never realized Hell was such a cool place!"

 

The demon said, "You gay?"

 

"No."

 

"Ooooh, you're gonna hate Fridays!"

[djroge1]

I have not forgotten' date=' and I [i']have[/i] learned and I do NOT ignore the facts the archaeologists have found - which are empirical proofs regarding many of the events mentioned in the Bible. Fact is I actually sent nearly 12 months in those very sites on the east bank of the River Jordan. I stood on Mount Nebo and looked out over the promised land, and saw Jericho and Jerusalem, as did Moses in his time. I climbed the stoney paths of Gadara and sat in the ruins of Umm Qais, from whence Paul wrote to the Corinthians - and listened to the archaelogists debate whether it was indeed there or elswhere in the holy lands. I stood in Bethlehem in three feet of snow that winter. I walked on the shores of the Sea of Galilee (though called Lake Tiberias by the local Druze) where so many of the significant things in the Life of Jeus took place. I even clambered up the mount from which his sermon was given until the Syrian militia drove up and ejected us at gunpoint (this was back in the eighties - things were..... tense back then). And I have seen the Dead-Sea Scrolls and the places they were found.

 

And the God stuff is hearsay and word of mouth. Yes, the people and places are all good, but because we have proof Hitler stood on the steps at Nurenburg, it does not follow that he said 'Ich Bein Ein Nurenburger, Ich liebe die jüdischen Leute'. Because he didn't.

 

You see I lived and worked in Jordan for a year - and spent a lot of my spare time with the archaelogists and the local christians and moslems (and it was a blast, I have to say.....).

 

And all I could see was a really well-meaning guy (Jesus) following in the footsteps of Buddha and Zoroaster and followed in turn by Muhammad, preaching peace and love and the avoidance of idolatry.

 

Sadly, the idolatry, and the bigoted, fundamentalist, hate fuelled killing in their names goes against everything they ever taught. And the Bible is at best wonderful parable and allegory, at worst a misogynistic paternalistic supression handbook - no more, no less.

 

That is absolutely amazing that a person can have eyes to see and ears to hear yet be so blind and so deaf. To come away from seeing first hand evidence that supports the Biblical claims and never being able to connect the dots and see that how proven facts give credibility to the Bible.

 

But then again we cannot discount the fact that the bible says that those who do not belong to God cannot understand Him or His ways. I guess that is why you cannot see and cannot hear nor understand the ways of God.

[Cruznolfart]

His ID.