gearbasher Posted January 31, 2023 Share Posted January 31, 2023 What's the difference between a vagina and a c u n t? A vagina is the female reproductive organ. A c u n t is everything that surrounds it. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitefang Posted January 31, 2023 Share Posted January 31, 2023 8 minutes ago, gearbasher said: What's the difference between a vagina and a c u n t? A vagina is the female reproductive organ. A c u n t is everything that surrounds it. But...... I know several what I'd call c u n t s that have no vaginas, but male genitalia . Even worked for a few now and then. Whitefang Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gearbasher Posted February 4, 2023 Share Posted February 4, 2023 (edited) The Lone Ranger is captured by the Comanches. The chief of the tribe tells the Lone Ranger that they will kill him in three days. But, they will grant him one request each day. So, the chief asks him: "What is your first request?" The Lone Ranger says: "Bring me my horse, Silver." They bring him his horse , he whisperers in Sliver's ear and the horse takes off running. About an hour later, Silver comes back with a beautiful blonde woman. The chief is so impressed, he lets her spend the night with the Lone Ranger. On the second day, the chief asks: "What is your second request?" The Lone Ranger, once again, says: "Bring me my horse, Silver." They bring him his horse , he whisperers in Sliver's ear and the horse takes off running. About an hour later, Silver comes back with a stunning redhead. The chief is so impressed, he lets her spend the night with the Lone Ranger. On the third day, the chief asks: "What is your final request?" The Lone Ranger, again, says: "Bring me my horse, Silver." They bring him his horse , he whisperers in Sliver's ear and the horse takes off running. About an hour later, Silver comes back with a gorgeous brunette. The Lone Ranger starts yelling at Silver: "You stupid horse. What's wrong with you?" The chief, confused, asks: 'Why are you calling your horse stupid? He brought you three of the most beautiful women I've ever seen." The Lone ranger answers: "Because all three times, I told him to bring back the posse." Edited February 4, 2023 by gearbasher 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitefang Posted February 4, 2023 Share Posted February 4, 2023 A fierce African native tribe captured two men from a safari that they claim desecrated sacred relics. Taken before the chief they were given a choice of punishments. "You have desecrated our sacred ancestral property. You can choose your punishment. Your choices are death, or bungee. Which do you choose?" Well the first man says, "As I assume bungee isn't death, then that's the punishment I choose." The chief says, "He chooses bungee so it shall be bungee." Then claps his hands. A very tall and burly native steps out of a hut and removes his loincloth to reveal a Penis that was a quarter inch from touching the ground and as thick as his neck. With little coaxing it was soon fully erect and hard as stone. Then the native proceeded to sodomize the first man savagely . When he was through the first man lay on the ground moaning and in a fetal position. The chief then says. "Place him in a hut until he recovers then set him free. He has had his punishment." Then turned to the second man and asked, "Which punishment do you choose? Death, or bungee?" And the second man says, "that bungee is the most most savagely humiliating thing I've ever seen done to a man. I would prefer to die rather than suffer that indignity. So I choose death." So the chief then said, "He chooses death and so it will be. Death. Death by bungee." Whitefang Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gearbasher Posted February 5, 2023 Share Posted February 5, 2023 Why did Sammy Davis Jr. go on "Wheel of Fortune". He wanted to buy an "I". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitefang Posted February 8, 2023 Share Posted February 8, 2023 I'll never forget my Father's last words to me.... ...."Hey kid! Wanna see something funny?" Whitefang Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ksdaddy Posted February 8, 2023 Share Posted February 8, 2023 I’ll never forget my grandfather’s last words to me. “Quit shaking the ladder, you little b*stard!” 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gearbasher Posted February 9, 2023 Share Posted February 9, 2023 What's the definition of an eternity? It's the amount of time from when the sex is over and she shuts up and lets you go to sleep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissouriPicker Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 Some people are like a case of Pampers. Self absorbed and full of ****. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitefang Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 21 hours ago, MissouriPicker said: Some people are like a case of Pampers. Self absorbed and full of ****. I had NO idea you could buy those used. Or why you'd want to. So, tell us all about where and why you got that case of Pampers you mentioned? Anyway..... Like Soupy Sales, I wonder where people who live in mobile homes hide their Christmas presents? And where do Japanese or Korean corporations move their operations when they want to save money by employing cheap labor? Viet Nam? Sri Lanka? Whitefang Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissouriPicker Posted February 16, 2023 Share Posted February 16, 2023 10 hours ago, Whitefang said: I had NO idea you could buy those used. Or why you'd want to. So, tell us all about where and why you got that case of Pampers you mentioned? Anyway..... Whitefang Damn’it, you’re always “pushing the envelope.”…..lol……If you[ve got to know, I get them out of dumpsters. Rinse’Em out, let’em dry and you’re ready-to-go. In a few years you’ll be one of us old folks, so remember this financial information. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitefang Posted February 16, 2023 Share Posted February 16, 2023 12 hours ago, MissouriPicker said: Damn’it, you’re always “pushing the envelope.”…..lol……If you[ve got to know, I get them out of dumpsters. Rinse’Em out, let’em dry and you’re ready-to-go. In a few years you’ll be one of us old folks, so remember this financial information. Thanks for the tip. It'll save me a TON of money to stop buying old T-shirts in thrift shops. And the duct tape to keep 'em from falling down. 🥴 And it's good to know that 72 doesn't make me an "old folk". Whitefang Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rabs Posted February 16, 2023 Share Posted February 16, 2023 Yup.. Im old 🙂 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissouriPicker Posted February 16, 2023 Share Posted February 16, 2023 On 2/14/2023 at 10:00 AM, fortyearspickn said: 3 hours ago, Whitefang said: Thanks for the tip. It'll save me a TON of money to stop buying old T-shirts in thrift shops. And the duct tape to keep 'em from falling down. 🥴 And it's good to know that 72 doesn't make me an "old folk". Whitefang Be careful of those old t-shirts at the thrift stores. You never know who was wearing it or what they were doing while wearing it. ….I forgot to mention that the best dumpsters are behind the retirement homes and rehab centers. Never pay for Pampers again!…..BTW, 72 ain’t bad. You’re just kind-of-an-old-folk. ….In three years you could catch-up with me, but I ain’t wait’in. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissouriPicker Posted February 16, 2023 Share Posted February 16, 2023 Apparently, women don’t like being complemented on their mustache. WHO KNEW! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitefang Posted February 17, 2023 Share Posted February 17, 2023 20 hours ago, MissouriPicker said: Be careful of those old t-shirts at the thrift stores. You never know who was wearing it or what they were doing while wearing it. ….I forgot to mention that the best dumpsters are behind the retirement homes and rehab centers. Never pay for Pampers again!…..BTW, 72 ain’t bad. You’re just kind-of-an-old-folk. ….In three years you could catch-up with me, but I ain’t wait’in. I just remembered..... Pampers doesn't make adult diapers. You must be pretty small in stature for them to work for ya. Of course though, given your age it's easy to see how the confusion set in. 😉 😜 And BTW---- The apostrophe goes AFTER the "n" in "WAITIN' ". See? Whitefang Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissouriPicker Posted February 17, 2023 Share Posted February 17, 2023 2 hours ago, Whitefang said: I just remembered..... Pampers doesn't make adult diapers. You must be pretty small in stature for them to work for ya. Of course though, given your age it's easy to see how the confusion set in. 😉 😜 And BTW---- The apostrophe goes AFTER the "n" in "WAITIN' ". See? Whitefang What do you expect? I’m three years older than you…….They don’t make adult diapers? Maybe that’s why the damn things don’t stay-on when I’m at Wal,Mart. Got to use more Gorilla Tape. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitefang Posted February 18, 2023 Share Posted February 18, 2023 21 hours ago, MissouriPicker said: What do you expect? I’m three years older than you…….They don’t make adult diapers? Maybe that’s why the damn things don’t stay-on when I’m at Wal,Mart. Got to use more Gorilla Tape. Not only that, but they're dishonest about their claim. I remember buying pampers when my kids were infants. On the package it'd say ""7-10 pounds". And they don't hold near as much! Whitefang 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gearbasher Posted February 19, 2023 Share Posted February 19, 2023 (edited) Three cowboys are sitting around the campfire and the conversation turns to "sexual positions". One cowboy says: "The rodeo position is my favorite." The other two look at each other and one asks: "The rodeo position? We never heard of that one. Can you describe it?" He says: "Sure. You get your wife down on all fours. Then you get behind her and reach around her waist with your left arm, gripping it tightly. Then you cup her left breast with your right hand, lean over and whisper in her ear: 'This is just the way your sister likes it.' Then you try to hang on for 8 seconds." Edited February 19, 2023 by gearbasher 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gearbasher Posted February 19, 2023 Share Posted February 19, 2023 (edited) My grandfather od'd on Viagra. My poor grandmother ended up taking it very hard. Edited February 19, 2023 by gearbasher Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gearbasher Posted February 19, 2023 Share Posted February 19, 2023 How does The Rock pee? He "Dwaynes" his Johnson. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitefang Posted February 20, 2023 Share Posted February 20, 2023 At the door of a brothel the madam confronts an old man with no arms and asked him what he wanted. "I want to see one of the girls." said the old man. The madam was aghast. "Loook at you." she said, "You're old and you don't have any arms. What can you possibly do with one of them?" She asked. The old man answered with a smile, "I rang the bell, didn't I?" Whitefang Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gearbasher Posted February 20, 2023 Share Posted February 20, 2023 A friend of mine told me that he was sleeping with twins. When I asked him how he could tell them apart. He said: "Well, Donna has the long blond hair and Paul has the penis. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissouriPicker Posted March 6, 2023 Share Posted March 6, 2023 (edited) https://imgur.com/a/yjp7hSe Edited March 7, 2023 by MissouriPicker 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissouriPicker Posted March 8, 2023 Share Posted March 8, 2023 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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