LarryUK Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 Last night I had an almighty bust up with my son (27). I was on my laptop looking into a problem for someone on the net. He's been having a problem with this map thing for 'Black ops' on his PS3. He just walks into the lounge, says 'I'm re-booting the router' and just turns it off. I told him I was doing something Yet he just turned it off. This happened four times before I blew my top. Am I just a moaner? He calls me a stress head. I think it's just ignorent and disrespectful to do it. He should have waited until I'd finished. What would you young one's parents say? What would you parents say? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kimbabig Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 Lat night I had an almighty bust up with my son(27). I was on my laptop looking into a problem for someone on the net. He's been having a problem with this map thing for 'Black ops' on his PS3. He just walks into the lounge, says 'I'm re-booting the router' and just turns it off. I told him I was doing something Yet he just turned it off. This happened four times before I blew my top. Am I just a moaner? He calls me a stress head. I think it's just ignorent and disrespectful to do it. He should have waited until I'd finished. What would you young one's parents say? What would you parents say? You spelled ignorant wrong Just kidding lashurst, I'm not a grammar nazi, yes he should have waited until you were finished, you are a higher authority than him, and even if he was in the higher, it would have been polite to wait. What would my parents say? Well I'll tell you if I did something like this, you wouldn't see me for a week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stein Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 i am a little comfused here..did i read this right? you have a son, 27, living at home, playing a video game. you don't like it the first time, and it happens 3 more times? he responds by calling you a stress head? i feel i am missing something. i have no way of knowing how my parents would react because i can not think of a time i treated them like i think you are saying. as a parent, i am not, but being 42, if a youngin' did that two me the first time, he would not be playing computer games or using the computer by the time the second time happened, that is, if i am correct that he is living in your house, using your router and you are paying for these. and i can't imagine being upset. but, then again, while i do anything for my family, i have had to kick my dad out twice. and i am also spending time on a website, just for fun. interesting, nonetheless...lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duende Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 I went through a troubled time from the age of about 19 to 22 and reading this makes me think how horrible I probably was in that period!Your son was certainly in the wrong but with youth lasting a lot longer these days, I suppose 27 is not like 27 even a decade ago. Immaturity seems to last longer! I am sure though he thinks the world of you really and will lose the attitude when he is ready Matt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stein Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 I went through a troubled time from the age of about 19 to 22 and reading this makes me think how horrible I probably was in that period!Your son was certainly in the wrong but with youth lasting a lot longer these days, I suppose 27 is not like 27 even a decade ago. Immaturity seems to last longer! I am sure though he thinks the world of you really and will lose the attitude when he is ready Matt there it is. i knew someone would have something helpful and wise to say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
retrosurfer1959 Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 Rudeness it's a stage they go through usually in the 13-17 year old range and all parenets have to deal threw it. But thats not your real issue, your problem is way more severe you have a son at 27 calling you a stress head? well first thing that comes to mind is the only way he should call you that is on the phone, what is he doing living at home at 27? Time for some tough love here so step one (#1) change your router id and tell him to go get himself a wireless air card, that way he can still be connected in step two (#2) - when you boot him out on the street and trust me it's for his own damn good. Adult kids shouldn't be living at home at that age and if they are it should be only as a guest while in school or other major issue, and guest don't act like that even if kids do. Unless were seeing this wrong and your living with him? if thats the issue then smile and say thanks son after each and every reboot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xaj Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 Iashurst, If he's 27 and is living under your roof, the very minimum he should do, and clearly he didn't, is to show you respect. Put it this way, I'm 34 so I'm not that far away from your son's age, but that would be completely unacceptable behaviour if it had been my parents. Maybe Matt is right and "kids" take longer to mature these days. I don't know. That's no excuse for that type of behaviour. Perhaps it is time for your son to learn the harsh realities of having to pay for everything that he has (internet and router included), renting a flat etc. I'm sorry I'm being a little blunt but I really don't like the sort of attitude he showed you or anyone else for that matter. (I just never did that sort of thing) Yes, retro is right, you know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cookieman15061 Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 Oh man nip this in the bud. I have a brother who's 44 and still lives at home and still plays video games. He has never paid rent let alone offered to help my parents with the mortgage, bought a grocery, paid a utility bill etc. Oh he does pay for the satellite dish because he's gotta have TV right. My folks never pushed him to grow up or take on responsibility and now are beside themselves with his self-centered nature. I hope this is not the road your son is headed. Good Luck my friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LarryUK Posted March 5, 2011 Author Share Posted March 5, 2011 Thanks for the replies. It's my house and I'm sick of it. I had both of my sons (27+30) back 15 months ago. They were living together and wanted to come back between apartments. My eldest has gone but my youngest is still here. They can't see any of my points. That's why I split up with their mom. I'd say no and she do it behind my back. Still the same now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WahKeen Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 At 27 he's an adult and should behave as one. With teenagers, they have the excuse of being kids, but a grown man acting like that is unacceptable. With family though, some things, unfortunately, don't change most of the time, especially if there's been a divorce or dysfunction. Like you alluded to, this sort of thing didn't just start to develop. It hasn't changed, and it's not going to unless someone breaks the cycle. Maybe your should see Dr. Phil... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pete c Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 he should have waited, or asked if it was ok. now the second time i would have lost it because he knew you where doing something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bowdiddley Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 he should have waited, or asked if it was ok. now the second time i would have lost it because he knew you where doing something. Same here, take his internet away for one week. Maybe he'll get the message. If he doesn't like that tell him to buy his own damn service. I'm sure he wasn't purposefully trying to annoy you, for some reason children living under our roofs think they own the place! and if you're like me Ms Lashurst probably took his side! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Searcy Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 They can't see any of my points. They can't see your points they can't live in your home. Might be a good night to sit down and go over the rules one more time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigKahune Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 Wow. Four times ? ! ? . . . I would've popped a plug. Doesn't bode well for the future of the relationshiop. Good luck with all that. Glad my kids are out on their own - since before they were 25. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoonerBuckeye Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 He was totally out of line. He needs to learn that if he were to do that (or something like it) to someone in the outside world, chances are the breakup he'd get would be a lot more than a vocal one. Bob Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strat-o-steve Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 I turn 30 this year, and if I did something like that to my dad even today, he would still beat my @$$ !!!! :D ( No, I don't live with my parents BTW ) Just sayin' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DAS44 Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 You have every right to be angry. I did that, my dad would blow gasket, and in my mind he'd have every right. That's completely disrespectful, and I honestly don't think it should be accepted in people my age! (I'm 16) You have every right to be mad, though it may be better put in a polite conversation than red faced confrontation (if you asked me). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChanMan Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 /shrug I just had a calm, rational discussion with my son about it. Never had another issue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WahKeen Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 /shrug I just had a calm, rational discussion with my son about it. Never had another issue. ??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie brown Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 I disturbs me, to hear about your son, Lazhurst. I see this kind of behavior to varying degrees, every day, nowadays. His generation, and younger, seem to have this real "Entitlement" attitude, way longer, and more intense, than any of us "older" folks could have imagined. If I had taken that attitude, and tone of voice, with my Dad, even at 15, he would have kicked my A$$. I would have been grounded, at the very least, and made to appologize, both to him, and my mother. And, rightfully so. If you don't discipline children (and, this doesn't mean abusing them, physically, verbally, or mentally), but setting rules, and sticking to them, then (I'm sorry to say) You are an enabler (and victim), of their whims, and bad behavior, later. Most "experts," agree, parents have to be parents, first...not their kid's "best friends." That might come later, when all the growing pains, are over, or have subsided, considerably...if one's lucky. Most kids, odd as it might seem, nowadays, WANT discipline! Even if/when they don't realize it. It shows them who really cares, what happens, to them. And, sets standards of behavior, that... hopefully, they will pass down, to their children, as well. But, at 27...that's going to be very difficult. Not impossible, but he'll need to learn there are real consequences, to his actions. By what you've described, he's had a free ride, with little or no consequences, so far. Sorry, if I sound harsh, or unforgiving, but you can't let them do that, for all kinds of reasons. Especially, for their own good! Anyway...just my 2-cents worth...take it, or leave it. CB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fl00dsm0k3 Posted March 6, 2011 Share Posted March 6, 2011 i think black ops map pack is a waste Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChanMan Posted March 6, 2011 Share Posted March 6, 2011 ??? Nah. It's kinda more like how they've been raised. Once we got past the "Stove hot" phase, I've always talked to my kids with respect and appealed to their intellect. Now, a simple, logical conversation is all that's necessary. They're good kids, mine are, and I am damn lucky to have them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie brown Posted March 6, 2011 Share Posted March 6, 2011 Nah. It's kinda more like how they've been raised. Once we got past the "Stove hot" phase, I've always talked to my kids with respect and appealed to their intellect. Now, a simple, logical conversation is all that's necessary. They're good kids, mine are, and I am damn lucky to have them. Yep! Exactly! Still, there's always some, that just don't "get it." Who knows, why? CB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
damian Posted March 6, 2011 Share Posted March 6, 2011 Give your son the re-boot !!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU deserve better treatment !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy R Posted March 6, 2011 Share Posted March 6, 2011 Well now i know where my little brother is living... Sorry about that.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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