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A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below.He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me

Here's one I made up last year.  It's bad.  😐 This Presbyterian Lutheran Jewish Amish Episcopalian Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saints guy walks into a bar.  Bartender says, "Why the long faith?

I heard the inventor of autocorrect died,  I didn't even know he was I'll.  

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A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game.  They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked  her experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles,  but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents." Dumbfounded, he asked, "What do you mean." "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and for the rest of the game,  all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!'  I'm like, "Hello? It's only 25 cents!" 

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On 8/1/2020 at 9:36 AM, ghost_of_fl said:

I like how Epiphones come with a 'not garbage' sticker just in case. 😄

You got a case with a Epiphone?  Oh my god..... I paid close to $900.00 for a limited custom and never got a case. Almost $700.00 for this last one and it won't have a case.  Didn't think Epiphone ever got the blue prints on how to make a guitar case. Lol

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A man inside his house hears a knocking on his door, upon opening the door he sees nothing, and then looks down on the porch.

There is a snail, he picks it up and throws it as hard as he can.  A year later, there is a knocking on his door agin.  The snail says,  "What did you do that for?" 

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At a remote monastery deep in the woods, the monks followed a rigid vow of silence. This vow could only be broken once a year on Christmas, by one monk, and the monk could speak only one sentence.

One Christmas, Brother Thomas had his turn to speak and said, "I love the delightful mashed potatoes we have every year with the Christmas roast!" Then he sat down. Silence ensued for 365 days.

The next Christmas, Brother Michael got his turn, and said, "I think the mashed potatoes are lumpy and I truly despise them!" Once again, silence ensued for 365 days.

The following Christmas, Brother Paul rose and said, "I am fed up with this constant bickering!"

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